It’s enough to bring a smile to his face. To ward off any disappointment he might have felt for me not attending the party at the shop, we had told him a little lie that I had mandatory practice that day.
“Your father will be visiting at your birthday party. How do you feel about seeing him again?” I hesitate to ask, but I’m curious what he thinks of Jerrod. I’ve hardly heard Aiden mention him these past few months.
He doesn’t say much, and shrugs. “How much longer will you and Mom be like this? Because it’s getting boring without you around.”
Boring can be interpreted as he missesme,not a word about Jerrod, and that puts all kinds of warm and fuzzy feelings into my heart. “I know. I’m sorry these adult things can be so… so…”
“Confusing? Can’t you just say you’re sorry and look at her like this—” He morphs his face into a sweet one, eyes slow blinking, lips in a soft curve, and hands clasped under his chin, like a begging cherub. “Works for me every single time.”
“Good advice. I might give that a try.” I stifle a laugh and reach out and hug him, our first ever. I have so much I want to say to him, like I wish I was his father, and I wish we were a family. But I can’t. “Come on, your grandma is waiting.”
I push through the doors to the warming area and nod. “Hello Marjorie.”
“A word, please?” She gestures with her head to the side, out of Eli’s earshot. “I dropped in on the workers at the building today. They’re making so much progress on the apartment. It’ll be beautiful when it’s done. I don’t even know how to thank you.”
“None needed. I wanted you to have a safe place to live.”
She smiles sheepishly. “For the record, I’m more Team Eli than Team Jerrod. I never really cared for him, more like put up with him. I think you are far better suited for my daughter. Just wish the two of you would kiss and make up already.”
I tug at the collar of my sweatshirt. “Hard to do when she wants space from me right now. I was hoping she might bring Eli to class this week. I have something big planned for the families next time, being the last class before Christmas. But I know she’s busy with finals. I’m sure we’ll iron things out, eventually.”
“I hope so. I think you’re the best thing Stella never knew she had.” She reassures with a squeeze on my arm. Aiden comes over, carrying his gear bag, all packed up for the night.
“I’m ready to go, Grandma.”
“Oh, say, Eli, can you drive him home? There are a few items I need to pick up from the grocery store for the party this weekend, and he still has to do his homework before bed.”
“But Mom told you before we left she has everything from the store we need,” Eli interjected, tilting his head at her.
“Uh, yes, but…” she chortles, and I’m on to her game, giving her the side-eye. “You know how much you love my chocolate pudding and Nilla wafer pie. I wanted to make it especially for your party this weekend.”
I play along. “I’ll get Aiden home. No problem.”
Once we’re out the door, and Eli runs ahead to my van, she pats my forearm reassuringly, or does she cop another feel of my muscles?
“Don’t you worry about a thing, Eli. I’ll get Stella there for the last class.” Turns out Marjorie is becoming an ally.
Across town, I drop Aiden off at the house and pop in, hoping Stella will give me a minute of her time. He runs to his room to do his homework. Unfortunately, she’s in a study group online at the dining room table, discussing current state laws for special education. None of what they discuss makes sense to me.
From my spot in the kitchen, observing her, what I do understand is the stress wearing on her—bloodshot eyes, lines etched deep into her forehead. She’s still beautiful. And wearing my old college jersey over leggings? Fucking lethal.
But she needs tender loving care, and maybe a massage, even a week away at a spa. I snort to myself because the likelihood of me getting her to agree to that is slim.
I need to get out of here and leave her be. Because this isn’t fair to see her like this, not to my heart, or to my cock.
I’m halfway to the garage, keys in hand, when I hear her say, “Hold on. I’ll be right back.”
“Eli?” she calls.
“Yes?” I shove my hands into my pockets; otherwise, I might carry her to my bed, get her naked, and make her see how thick, long, and sorry I am for saying I wanted to beat up her ex.
“Where’s Mom?” She asks.
“Grocery store.”
“Oh? Well, thanks for bringing Aiden home.”
Home. Sure. Tomyplace—the one I wanted to share with her that has somehow become awkward territory.
