My family burned while I ran.
They died looking for me.
I don’t deserve a home.
I don’t deserve belonging.
Home is for daughters who didn’t fail their family.
I owe my suffering to them.
The only thing that pays the debt I owe them is vengeance.
I squeeze my eyes shut, shaking.
I refuse this.
I refuse this truth.
I refuse to want something I lost because of me.
I hiss because the skin between my breasts where the tattoo is burns. Suddenly, the fog that clouds my mind lifts.
I blink, and the darkness starts to fade.
I see the grimy wall in front of me.
The memories from the Trial of Truth surge through my mind.
I remember.
Finally, I remember everything.
The true intention of your heart is to belong,Lorca’s voice whispers in my mind. That’s what the trickster god told me that I couldn’t comprehend during the trial.
No way it’s this simple. This…mundane.
Immediately, I recoil at that thought. Now that the misty darkness covering my mind and my sight has lifted, I see clearer. I can think clearer.
This can’t be it. I refuse this as my true heart’s desire.
What, have these three years been a fucking waste? I shake my head.Fuck this.
A familiar chuckle echoes in my mind. A chill goes down my back and I look around the dark alley. I’m alone.
The low voice in my mind says,You found your way to me, Phoenix Wildarrow. Yet nothing has changed.
You. Lorca, the trickster god.
A gentle caress of the claws.You even learned my name. How delightful.
“What the actual fuck.” I breathe out the words.
Now that you know the truth, are you ready to accept it?
I frown.No. This is bullshit. It changes nothing. Will you…are you always going to be inside my mind now?
When it pleases me to do so. I’ve got other things to do, too.An amused chuckle.I must say, though. You’re my favorite plaything.
