We stared at each other.
"I'm not." I found myself saying.
Matthew's brow creased in confusion "not what?"
"Gay." I clarified, voice low. The other scoffed, shaking his head "didn't seem that way when you were begging for my dick in your ass."
My jaw dropped.The fuck?
"You remember that, right?" Matt grunted, leaning back on his hands, wincing as the movement pulled at the injury on his back.
I did remember. I preferred not to answer, which appeared to be an answer enough.
"Thought so."
"Fuck you." I grumbled, tilting my head back against the wall and folding my arms over my chest. I didn't feel like arguing about this same topic again. It was getting stupid.
My attention flew back to Matthew when he got to his feet, albeit stiffly and with a small wince, approaching me slowly. He stopped when he was inches away.
"We could do it again sometime." He tilted his head, eyes flickering up and down my face, pausing at my eyes, searching them. I felt my heartbeat sped up, my cock twitch. Oh my god. Oh my god, oh my god-
"We couldn't." I said tightly. I stopped there. I wanted to. That was the disgusting part. IwantedMatthew to fuck me. Shame washed over me.
“I don’t want to.” I added firmly.
Matthew scoffed, though I was sure a flash of disappointment crossed his face before he replied “we’ll see, Danes. We’ll see.”
CHAPTER 10
Matthew
I was right- the same night they burnt the Fleshbinder- thanks to Stryker, who had returned with a deep gash in his side but a proud grin on his face, claiming to have been the one to track it down and knock it to the ground- and the next morning we left the town and headed back to Zeltron.
There, part of the group, including me and Jack, left with Johnathan’s soldiers to follow to Draelon, and commander Roberts, promised more would arrive the next day.
Me and Jack kept our distance from the others, mostly because he was worried about me. Honestly, I couldn’t even bring myself to try and convince him that I was fine, because I felt like hell warmed over. My body burned and the seasickness hadn’t done me any favours. What also wasn’t doing me any favours was the knowledge that I’d be seeing Theoevery daysince we’d been placed in the same unit as him. How was I supposed to control the insane urge to slam him against the wallevery day? Fuck my life.
The room was nice. Jack was grinning ear to ear because there was a sofa in it; I couldn’t muster any particular glee, mainly because my head was spinning, my legs were trembling beneath me and I was feeling woozy.
“I’m gonna have a shower.” I told him meekly, hoping it would somehow help.
Jack, sprawled on his bed, mumbled “feeling okay? You disinfected your wounds?”
“Yeah.” I lied hastily, backing out into the hallway. The shower room was just opposite ours, lined with at least ten; I peeled off my clothes, grumbling as the movement pulled on my injuries, and completely avoided looking down at myself, opting for stepping directly into the cold spray of water, hissing.
It stung, but it made me feel less gritty. I briefly allowed myself to imagine showering with Danes and fucking him against the shower wall as he moaned my name like he had the other night- my dick began hardening at the very thought before I shook myself-what waswrongwith me?-and cranked the heat up. It took seconds for my vision to begin to cloud. I blinked, brows furrowing.That was weird.
I sucked in a few deep breaths, but it wasn’t helping- I still felt faint.My heart rammed against my chest as I tried and failed to turn the water off, black dots swarming my vision.
My body throbbed. Fuck.Fuck.
“Jack?” I yelled, praying he’d be able to hear my through the closed doors “Jack!” I attempted to scramble my way out of the spray of steaming water; instead, my knees buckled and I fell, a loud bang echoing as I did.
Jack barged in. I faintly heard him curse before the water stopped streaming; he crouched, his face swimming in and out of focus.
“Matt? What happened?”
“I- I don’t know.”
