When the press of a finger pushed at my ass, I clenched my eyes closed. He was gentle, probing slowly inside until he was second-knuckle deep, and it wasn’t painful. Uncomfortable, yes. As tempting as it was to glance over my shoulder at him, I kept my face hidden. My cheeks felt too hot, and my heart drummed against my ribs too hard.
Two fingers started to get painful, but it was bearable. Getting kicked in the nuts hurt more than this. Once he got to four fingers, I started to feel it. The burning sensation had me wriggling uncomfortably.
“Just put your cock in,” I grunted out.
“Fuck, Colton, if you would give me a chance to do this the right—”
“Cock. Now.” I threw a glare over my shoulder.
“Are you not enjoying this? Let me suck your dick first.” He went to turn me, but I grabbed his wrist. We stared at each other, not quite angrily, but there was a fierceness there, sizzling below the surface. This wasn’t going anywhere if I didn’t put on an act.
Smiling, I said, “Please put your big fat cock in me.”
He blinked in confusion. “That’s not convincing me you’re okay. You don’t ever say please.”
I rolled my eyes and shifted until I was on my knees with my ass in the air. My cock hadn’t fully deflated, but it wasn’t as hard as it was before, and it hung between my legs. “Just do it, Charley.”
He sighed and kissed my right asscheek, which was weird because his mouth hadn’t ever been that close to my ass before, but it wasn’t horrible. My cock twitched. Rising to his knees, he rubbed my lower back until I turned to glare at him again. He gave me a pointed look that asked the stupid question of “are you sure?” I nodded, and he grabbed the lube, coating his cock and making it all shiny. His erection didn’t look monstrous from here, but I still knew I’d feel it when he pushed inside me.
I wasn’t wrong.
His cock spread me apart, and even though he did it slow, the pain reverberated from my hole. I didn’t know which was worse—the burning sensation or the fullness of having a cock inside me. Maybe both. Fuck, I didn’t like it. There was too much pressure, and my gut twisted. The anxiety made my ass clench harder around his cock, to the point it was past discomfort. I fucking hated it.
“Wait.” I turned and splayed my hand on his chest, shoving him. He slipped out of me, falling on his ass.
“Are you okay?” he asked, eyes wide as I pushed myself off the bed, nearly tripping over the blankets in my hastiness to get up.
“I was wrong. I don’t want your cock in me.” I crossed my arms, the stretch still burning in my hole. My cock twitched, but I ignored it because that fucker didn’t know what it wanted.
“Colton.” He went to reach for me, but I stepped away.
“Fuck this.” I stalked past the bed, out of the bedroom, and toward the bathroom.
“Colton!” His feet thumped on the floor and I assumed he was following me, but I picked up the pace.
I ignored him calling my name as I locked myself inside the bathroom and leaned against the door, sighing. Fuck. Talk aboutchildish. My younger brother Josh would laugh his ass off if he knew what I’d done. Any of the guys would.
A knock on the door vibrated against my back.
“Colton?” Charley sighed loud enough to carry in to me, and there was a thump, like he’d let his forehead fall against the wood. “I’m sorry. If you don’t want me to fuck you, I won’t. You can fuck me. Can we just talk about it?”
I grunted and rubbed my churning gut. Nausea stirred up inside me, mixed with the anxiety. “I don’t talk about feelings and shit, Fish. I’m gonna shower and head to bed. You should do the same.”
“Is this how it’s going to be? We’re going to ignore what happened?”
“Nothing happened.”
He let out a frustrated yell. “Fine. We’ll pretend it never happened. We’ll do it your way. Can you at least let me in to shower with you? I’ll let you fuck me.”
I sighed and pressed my fingers to my forehead. My heart had slowed down, but my insides had knotted until I thought I was going to be sick. Fucking him would take my mind off it, though. I straightened and unlocked the door, opening it. He stood on the other side, mouth downturned sadly like a kicked puppy dog.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, touching my chest. “I won’t ask again. Let’s go shower.”
My brain told me totellhim how I was feeling and let him know that I was fucking sick to the stomach with nerves and unease and it was my first time bottoming—but I couldn’t. I was Scar, big bad biker, and I couldn’t show him my every weakness.
Right?
So why did I feel so shitty about it?
