Not long into our stare down, he parted his pretty lips for me, and I popped the pills in. The metal in his mouth winked in the light and had my thoughts straying directly into the gutter.
“Ugh.” He groaned and groped for the glass of water I’d brought from the kitchen, and once he had it in his hand he chugged while making faces.
“You can’t taste those pills,” I chided.
“It’s medicine, and I know it tastes bad. I don’t have to actually taste it to know it.”
“That makes no sense.”
He shrugged and didn’t seem to care, and I wondered how much of this was Angel and how much was him already playing around with his middle personality—not that they were necessarily different. But, there were always subtleties in this type of play. Excitement had me wanting to pick him up and squeeze him. His cast put a stop to that idea.
“Like I said, I was reading.” He glanced at my face, almost like he needed a cue that this conversation was okay, and I was thrilled with how often he searched out responses from me.
“Please, ask me any questions. I don’t want you to worry over something you read on the internet. There’s a lot of bad advice out there.”
“Who are you in our pretending?” He picked at a string on the ripped knee of his jeans. “I get that I’m the… the kid. But who are you? I’m not… I’m not sure I like some of the stuff I read.”
My bubble burst, and a thousand pounds dropped directly onto my head. If he didn’t want me to be his Daddy…. I’d promised myself I would be gentle with him. I tried to take a deep breath. We were still in the talking stage, and it wouldn’t help if I pushed anything on him.
“You mean who am I in our role playing?”
“Can we call it pretending? I pretend all the time in my head.” He leaned toward me and the earnest gleam in his eyes let me know that if I screwed up with him right now, I might ruin all of this forever. He flashed a small, genuine smile at me. “All the time, I pretend, and I like that better. Role play sounds like cosplay, and that’s something fake. It’s not real. Pretending is more real to me.”
He abandoned his jeans and twisted the hem of his shirt between his fingers instead. I tugged the fabric loose as he swallowed hard.
“What a cutie you are. Such a good boy for telling me everything you’re thinking.”
He smiled and glanced away from me. I could already tell I’d want to compliment him a lot because he seemed dazed every time I did it.
“We’re pretending. I’m fine with calling it that.”
“You didn’t answer me! You said you’d answer me.” His smile twisted down in one corner.
“You’re right. I didn’t answer your question. Are you hungry?”
His eyes widened and a spark of actual anger glowed in them. “You’re ignoring me and my question.”
“No, I’m not. I’m going to answer, but this conversation might take a minute. Do you want me to order dinner first?”
He rolled his eyes and nodded. I dragged my phone out of my pocket. I’d already had the pizza order ready to go, just needed to send it through. During the few minutes it took me to have pizzas speeding their way toward us, he was back to twisting his shirt between his fingers and added a foot tapping out a steady rhythm on the floor to his nervous shifting.
“Done,” I said and set my phone down on the coffee table next to his new pencils, which had him giving them a longing glance. “It’s simple. I’m in charge of you.” I tapped his nose, and he startled and blinked at me. If I wasn’t careful I’d get off track memorizing all of his quirks. I already wanted to see that adorable flutter of his eyelashes again. “How do you like to think of me?”
Angel snagged his lip piercing with his teeth, and my cock firmed at the sight of his pink tongue darting out to roll the metal around. I’d held him last night and managed not to rush him—barely. I’d badly wanted to haul my cock out and give him a pearl necklace. He was just my type—slim and toned. Big dark eyes. Pretty mouth. I was certain he’d be fucking beautiful riding my cock. If I did this right, I’d have everything I wanted. Willing myself to ignore the way he moved that hoop around while he thought, I forced my attention back to his conflicted gaze.
“I always… when.” He shook his head and closed his eyes. “I always pretended it would be nice to have a big brother. He would protect me and keep people from hurting me. I read that usually there’s a… a….”
“Daddy.”
He winced and nodded. Fuck, what had I been thinking? Maybe this wouldn’t work at all, and Creed was right. I wanted him to bewrong. Needed this to happen. Angel was sitting here in front of me, and I wanted to be the man for him.
“Is that okay? Big Brother?” The words tumbled from him in a rush. “I know it’s different. I never do anything right.”
“The only right is what we want.”
The scared way he glanced toward the door let me know he didn’t believe me. I laid my hand on his, and he let out a ragged breath. “Why would you want to be my… my hero?” he asked with a laugh that almost sounded like it hurt him. “That’s what this is. All you’ve done since you apologized that first time is push me to be happy and safe. I keep expecting you to vanish, too. Heroes always leave when the work is done.”
“I won’t leave,” I promised immediately, even though it was too soon, and I wasn’t someone who was emotional. My blood pounded with the need to make sure he knew I intended to be here for him. “I don’t know why I like taking care of someone, but I do. Remember my friend Creed? He figures my sisters smothered me too much with love and now I’m… I don’t know. He has all these theories about why everyone does everything they do.”
