Kwan leaned more into Harley, who staggered but held him up.
“Pup.”
He shrugged. “I was a bad dog.”
Pure rage flashed through me, an unnatural paleness washed out Harley, and Madden seemed sort of seasick and put a hand to his stomach, but Nicky shared a look with me, and I knew then why we were good friends in spite of our age difference. He was ready to murder too.
“There’s no such thing as bad dogs, pup. Don’t you know? Just bad owners,” I whispered. He let Harley and I get him into the back seat of the car.
“I’ll stop around to help,” Nicky said quietly as he came over to give me a bro-pat hug. I smacked his back in return, still not really able to talk, and I seethed the entire drive home.
10
Icouldn’t stop staring at Kwan. I hated dogs, but there was something about this one, with his sad eyes and whimpering, that made my chest squeeze in sympathy. While I might have been abandoned, no owner had dared to raise their hand to me.
He sat beside the table, his head lowered as he stared impassively at the blue food bowl in front of him. Brad had tried to coax him away from being his pup, but he refused to come back as a human, preferring to sit on his knees and whine in sorrow. I sat in the chair closest to him while Brad and Nicky conversed between themselves quietly at the other end of the table, and I didn’t know what I could say to make him feel better. Canines and felines were too different, and even as a human I wasn’t good with other people’s emotions. I preferred logic, but I had a feeling Kwan wouldn’t appreciate having numbers thrown in his face.
In the laundry room, my cat Penny meowed in irritation, nearly as upset as Kwan. Last I’d seen of her, she was hiding under the sink. I couldn’t believe how loud she was. We’d stopped to pick her and her things up on the way back here, but she was protesting. So far, Brad hadn’t even given me a single irritated look about the situation. I rubbed my cheeks hard with my palms and groaned under my breath.
The other man, Madden, came back from the spare room upstairs, where he and his boyfriend had set the kennel. They were both handsome men with dark hair, but while Madden couldn’t have been more than five-foot-six, his boyfriend, Evan, towered over him and had more muscle. When he’d first gotten the kennel out of the bed of the truck, he’d winced, and Madden had explained to me that Evan had an old injury from being shot on the job as a cop. Now he worked as a private investigator. I’d only half listened to everything else Madden had said—and there was a lot to listen to—because I’d been more interested in studying my competition.
Now, though, I felt shitty for even doing that.
Kwan was hurting. Maybe he’d been abused worse than he would’ve been otherwise because I’d kept Brad from taking him last weekend. I sniffed, not really feeling generous about a puppy being in the house, but I wasn’t deep in my cat persona, so I had a little more control over my feelings for dogs. At least, I liked to think so.
“You should eat,” I said stiffly, gesturing to the cookie sitting pitifully in his bowl.
“I’m not hungry.” Kwan let out a long sigh and stared up at me with tormented brown eyes. They were a deep color, and I had to admit, yet again, that he wasn’t terrible to look at. “I was a bad dog.”
I shook my head. “He was a horrible person, not the kind of owner any pet needs in their life.”
“But I—”
“Do you know how many subs die from a Dom’s hand, Kwan?” I asked, cutting him off.
He shook his head with a whimper and licked at his hand like a wounded dog. He’d put on his paws and knee guards after he’d had a shower, as well as some beige shorts and a green T-shirt that Brad had loaned to him. Nothing fancy, but they were still Brad’s clothes, and I didn’t like it one bit. All of Kwan’s were dirty right now, and Brad wouldn’t let him put them on until they were washed.
“No,” he said after an agonizingly long time.
I opened my mouth and then exhaled. “I don’t either, actually, but I’m sure it’s not zero. He never deserved to be a Dom or an owner. Did you have a safeword, at least?”
Again, Kwan blinked at me with those brown doe eyes, and his innocence made me flinch. I had to wonder if his ex was his first owner.
“Yes, but he said it was mean for me to use it, and I didn’t want to be a mean dog.”
I glanced at Brad and Nicky, who’d both stopped their conversation to listen to what Kwan was saying. Madden stood beside Nicky, and his boyfriend had come into the room from the stairs that led to the back of the kitchen. Suddenly, I felt like I was on a stage performing for them, and I’d never been good under this kind of pressure. I always said something stupid.
I rose, aware of Brad’s eyes on me as I strode out of the room to the den. Kwan had already been informed, gently by Brad, that the den was off-limits for him, which I’d been happy with. At least my owner respected my wishes. Grabbing one of my balls with a bell inside, I walked back into the kitchen with it.
Kwan’s head perked up at the sound and he frowned at the green plastic ball I dropped in front of him.
“That’s mine,” I said sharply, “so don’t break it, or you’ll need to replace it. But… you can play with it for a while, if you’d like.”
Kwan grinned up at me, eyes sparkling as he leaned down to nudge it with his nose. The bell inside tinkled and the hairs on my arm stood to attention with excitement. That sound always made me want to fall to my hands and knees and be a cat.
I glanced back at Brad, and his smile was worth it. The pride in his eyes had a spark of pleasure slithering its way down my spine, and I returned his grin.
“Thank you,” Kwan said, startling me into looking back at him. He tilted his head, lips sucked into his mouth as he stared up at me. “Thank you, Harley.”
