Jake
I’d been on the way home from the second pharmacy when Griffin called me. My mind ran on autopilot from anxiety. When I agreed to meet with him on Valentine’s Day, I barely understood what I was doing. My brain was so distracted that saying yes felt like the safest option, so I ran with it.
And now I was in a huge mess.
I sat in the middle of my bed in the darkness and stared at the plastic bag containing my purchases. I was almost afraid to open it and reveal the contents. Seeing them and holding them in my hands would make all of thistooreal.
Beside me, Lilith meowed and flicked her tail. She’d apparently been asleep the entire time I was gone. She blinked at the bag, then gazed at me expectantly, like it contained food for her.
“Sorry, girl,” I mumbled. “I wish this was just cat food, but it’s for me, unfortunately.”
I sighed and kicked the bag away to the foot of the bed as I slumped deeper into depression. Lilith became excited by the bag’s movement and pounced on it.
“Lilith…”
I sighed and grabbed the bag before she decimated it the same way she’d done to the mouse earlier. I frowned at the items inside the bag - two small cardboard boxes that represented a major crossroads.
One was a pregnancy test. The other was a box of morning-after pills.
Why was I hesitating? That was the part that freaked me out the most. The Jake I knew would have tossed the test out the window and taken a morning-after pill as soon as possible.
The Jake who hesitated now was a stranger to me. I’dbecomea stranger to myself.
My hands trembled. My eyes tightened and began to ache in the tell-tale way that signalled tears were about to fall. Gripping each box in opposite hands, I began to cry.
Lilith let out a tiny meow and pressed herself against my side. That made me cry even harder. I stroked her from head to tail, allowing myself to indulge in the comfort of her soft fur. She began purring, and despite everything, I laughed.
“What do you have to be happy about?” I asked her. “You got dumped on the street while two weeks away from giving birth, and now you live with strangers. Your life sucks, Lilith.”
Lilith kept purring, oblivious to my words.
I exhaled shakily and continued petting her. While my hand moved in soothing strokes, my mind relaxed enough to think logically.
I had two options - one, I could do nothing and wait a few weeks before taking a pregnancy test. If it ended up negative, fine. But if it was positive, that would open up a whole new can of worms.
Or two, I could take the pill now and forget any of this ever happened. No consequences. My life would continue on as if this struggle never occurred.
I should have taken the second option without question.
Sowhywas I questioning it?
With a frustrated cry, I threw both boxes at the wall. Lilith flicked her ears in the direction of the noise, but didn’t move.
“Great. My cat is more emotionally stable than me,” I mumbled.
She pressed her heavy weight against me, and I kept petting her.
Something suddenly touched my hand.
My eyes snapped open and I looked down. Nothing was there except Lilith’s big belly. Then I realized with a gasp that one of her kittens had kicked me.
I bit my lip and gently placed my palm lower on her belly. A moment later, the kittens squirmed again. It struck me just how close she was to bringing new life into this world, and howrelaxedshe was about it. She didn’t have a care at all as she nuzzled her head against my thigh, demanding more attention.
Of course, I caved and gave it to her. I scratched gently behind her ears, which apparently pleased her, since she headbutted me for more.
My other hand still rested on her squirming belly, and the longer we stayed in that position, the more comfortable I felt. Then, I slowly withdrew my hand on her belly and placed it on my own. Obviously, nothing had physically changed since the night Griffin and I had sex, but it still felt strangely tingly beneath my fingers. Maybe it was just my mind playing tricks on me.
I glanced at the two boxes that lay abandoned on the floor across the room.
