She clung to him with arms and legs when she answered, “Foreverything.”
And then it all spilled out of her in a torrent, as painful and relentless as her tears. She explained how awful she felt for not listening to him, how she blamed herself for Ruby’s disappearance and Norman’s death, how wretched she felt about his choice to disobey Theodore, and how selfish she was, how little she’d done to earn his help, his care, the fuckingjam.
Most heart-wrenching was her confession that she believed wholeheartedly that he’d been given a rotten mate and that she didn’t blame him if he wished he’d been saddled with anyone else.
It was like he was being torn to pieces. She shredded him with every new confession, taking chunks of him bit by bit until he was a bloody mess beneath her.
“Is this what you’ve been stewing on for the past two days?” he croaked.
Atria nodded, face buried in his neck.
Gods, I’m a fucking idiot.
He knew she felt guilty and he understood that the shock of so much violence and betrayal would take its toll on her. That was why he didn’t press her during their drive. Some things needed to be worked out in one’s head first. She needed space, so he’d given it to her.
Only now, with all this poison in the air, did he realize that might have been a mistake. The whole time he’d been right next to her,insideher, and she’d been thinking about how he must wish he had someone else? That she’d ruined his life?
Kaz wrapped his arms around her back and squeezed her tightly, almost wishing he could lock her in the cage of his chest to keep her safe beneath bone and muscle, nestled against the heart that belonged to her — that hadalwaysbelonged to her.
“Princess, I need you to know something about me.”
She sniffled. “What?”
Kaz opened his eyes to stare at the beams of the ceiling. Outside, wind howled across the plains. It whistled a familiar, lonely song around the cone of the turf roof.
“I’m not like you. I don’t do— I’m not good with emotions. I don’tdothem. Most days I like to think I don’t feel shit. Life’s a lot easier for me that way.” He paused, struggling to find the words that would heal the wound she’d revealed. “But… I know that I have to learn how to read you and what you need from me. You’re going to have to train me, princess, because I had no fucking idea you were feeling any of this. I never would have even suspected it because it’s so far from— It’s nottrue,Atria.”
She slowly lifted her head. Her eyes were huge and wet beneath pinched brows when she asked, “What do you mean you don’t feel things?”
His throat tightened. “My brother and I both struggled with anger issues when we were kids. He figured his shit out. I just shifted into being useful. Some days I don’t know if I feel anything other than aggression, and I know people think that I— Sometimes they wonder if I ever feel anything. It matters to me that you don’t think the same thing.”
Silence reigned for the span of several heartbeats. Atria stared at him like she couldn’t process what he was saying.
Finally, she pressed her soft hands over his heart. “They’re wrong, Kaz. They’resowrong. You— I’ve never felt anything like you before. When I touch you, it’s like I’m sinking into anocean.”
Her hands crept up to cup his neck. Atria leaned down to press her cheek against his, her brows drawn in a look of such profound longing, the sight of it froze him in place. In a whisper, she continued, “Everyone’s emotional landscape feels different, but you… Ilovefeeling you, Kaz. I love getting lost in your ocean, feeling like you’re all around me. It feels safe and wild andhonest.”
Now it was his turn to feel like he couldn’t breathe. She’d mentioned her abilities off-hand a few times and he knew she sensed him more than he was initially comfortable with, but avoided pressing the subject so far. Now, though, he was desperate to know. “Do you feel me all the time?”
He felt her lashes, wet with tears, flutter against his cheekbone. A soft, tickling caress that made him ache. “I try not to invade people’s privacy, but…”
“But?”
Her voice was whisper-soft, like she worried he would be angry at her, when she confessed, “I like to feel you. I… There’s a term empaths use for when we connect with someone so deeply, we become enmeshed in their aura. It’s calledtethering.We tangle ourselves up in another person because it feels— good. Like home. We become so attuned to that person that we can feel every tiny shift, every flicker of emotion. Our magic seeks them out unconsciously and over time we… we become attached.”
Kaz’s ears buzzed. That feeling of pulling, that tight, chest-yanking sensation came back with a vengeance.
Gently, he tilted Atria’s head back so he could gauge her expression. “Princess, did you tether yourself to me?”
Her eyes squeezed shut. Voice wobbling, she answered, “I know it was an invasion of your privacy and I should have asked first. I’m so sorry. I was scared and you felt— It doesn’t matter. I shouldn’t have. It was selfish and I knew it. I let go when we got here because it’s not right and—”
He cupped her jaw and surged up from his reclined position to seal his lips over hers. She yelped but didn’t balk when he pressed hard, demanding she open for his seeking tongue and hungry lips.
Her mouth parted under his. He didn’t waste a second. Kaz was so hungry for her, he couldn’t think beyond his need to devour, to taste and suck and bite.
She feels me,he thought, lust and tenderness blending into something so huge it threatened to burst out of him.I feel like home. She came to me when she was scared. She needed me. She wants me.
ChapterThirty-Four
