He eyed Frans. There was a good amount of Christmas decorations hanging above the aisles.
“It’s almost December,” Harlow pointed out. Pulling a cart free, he started pushing it forward.
“But it’s not! And they started this nonsense months ago,” Foxx whined as he followed beside him.
“I’m curious,” he drawled, as he picked up a head of lettuce and looked it over. “Why do you hate Christmas so much? Or do you hate all the holidays equally? Though I don’t recall you being like this during Halloween.”
Foxx snorted and picked up a bag of apples, placing them in the cart. “Halloween is just costumes and chocolates, and some think it’s the devil’s work, so how can I fully commit to hating it? To be fair, I hate Easter too, but it’s less annoying as it doesn’tlinger. With Christmas, you have songs everywhere singing about the ‘Lord’, decorations, dumb nativity scenes. For MONTHS! People saying ‘God bless you’ in the streets. Bells, trees, lights, ugh. It’s everywhere! You can’t avoid it. Those twits are shoving this bollock at you at every turn. Worse, it randomly pops up in July now?! And did you know that certain Christmas songs actually physically cause my kind pain? But, oh no, can’t possibly offend the Christians, Catholics, and the rest by banning them from the radio. Imagine having to walk around for more than three months out of the year trying to dodge music that causes you physical pain because idiots want to shove their religion down everyone’s throats?! To make matters worse, in part of the globe, the blasted holiday falls when the weather is at its worst!”
“You know, Christmas, like most Christian holidays, is really just an absorption of a lot of Pagan traditions.”
“Yeah, well, that was then, this is now. Who gives a fuck about the origin when the now is annoying as all hell?”
Harlow chuckled as he placed the lettuce in a bag, before grabbing a few other greens. But, as usual, the vampire tried to usher him quickly along and out of the produce aisle and towards the bread.
“Ahh much better options here!”
“Much more fattening options,” Harlow said with a headshake.
“Fattening and delicious, old man. Fattening AND delicious.”
Harlow had never been much of a sweets person, but he did like breads of all kinds. Also pie… He was weak for both. But he tried to stay away from it all.
He was forty-five, which was too old to just eat everything he loved if he wanted to stay in shape and keep doing his job. He grimaced as Foxx dumped things into the cart that he wouldn’t have touched even if he’d been younger.
Harlow would never admit it, especially not to Foxx, but he was slowing down. Frankly, he wasn’t sure what he was going to do with himself if he was forced to retire. Part of him wondered if maybe it would be better to go out in a blaze of glory, before he reached a point where he couldn’t work anymore.
As it was, the aches in the winter were getting worse, and each new wound took longer and longer to heal and recover from. Getting old sucked. At least…Harlow was pretty sure he still had a good ten years left…maybe…
Foxx let out a giggle, pulling his focus back on him. He frowned at the item in the vampire’s hands.
“I’m surprised you’d even touch that, brat. I thought you hated Christmas.”
Foxx eyed him. “It’s different.”
“Different, how? The cakes are literally shaped like Christmas trees. And there are lots of others in a different shape to choose from. Why would you choose the Christmas themed ones?”
Foxx clutched the box to his chest as if he thought Harlow would take it from him. “See, this is where you are wrong, old man. It is not a choice. Tree shaped Zebra Cakes are the best ones. The most delicious, the freshest, the ones with superior texture and mouthfeel. If it is there to be chosen, it is the only choice. Normal Zebra Cakes do not compare in any way to the tree ones.”
Harlow stared. Was Foxx fucking with him? “You can’t be serious…”
“I’m very serious. They are the best ones.”
He sighed. “Okay… That still doesn’t explain you eating them in the first place… They are Christmas trees.”
“See, them being Christmas trees is just a bonus. Because each time I eat one, I get to destroy a huge symbol of Christmas spirit. That gives me immeasurable pleasure.”
“You have issues.”
“ME?!” Foxx’s nose wrinkled. “You have zero room to talk, Mr. Creepy, who set up a camera in my sewing room.” The vampire dropped the box into the cart with a huff.
Harlow shrugged. “I need to find my entertainment somehow.”
“I am not your entertainment!” Foxx hissed at him before finally walking past the aisle.
Harlow pushed the cart forward. “Why did I have to get a partner who not only dresses like a child but eats like one?”
Foxx’s back went stiff, before his head snapped in Harlow’s direction. “You take that back! I do not dress like a child, nor will I take fashion advice from someone who dresses like you do. And you are just jealous that I can eat whatever I want and not gain weight.”
