“I told you, it’s fine, love.”
“You need to sleep. You have that deadline next week, and here I am, messing up your schedule again. I don’t know how you put up with—”
Sam interrupted him with a soft kiss, and Ollie whimpered quietly as he leaned into Sam, deepening the kiss. Sam’s hand caressed up Ollie’s back and then stilled as Sam backed off a bit, the kiss gentling into lighter touches until Sam finally pulled away.
“You are more important to me than anything else, Oliver James,” Sam reminded him, resting his forehead against Ollie’s and sliding his hand up from Ollie’s back to cup his cheek. “I can nap later while you’re at work. If it’d help settle your mind, I’ll get up with you now and go running. Thenmaybe I’ll make those blueberry pancakes you love. And then I can catch a few more hours of sleep after I walk you to the lab.” Sam’s fingers brushed along Ollie’s jawline, and he kissed Ollie again softly. “I love you.”
“I . . . know,” Ollie said, and with a resigned sigh, he added, “But your deadline . . . ?”
“I got a lot of work done yesterday. I’ll finish everything by next Wednesday. I promise. And then, Thursday through Sunday, I’m all yours.”
Ollie smiled at the sentiment but quickly ducked his head into Sam’s shoulder to hide the guilt he couldn’t quite get rid of. Despite all of Sam’s reassurance, his stomach still felt unsettled knowing how little sleep Sam got on mornings like this.
Sam shifted to hold Ollie against him more tightly and breathed another kiss on his cheek. “Come on, love. You’ll feel better after we go running. You always do,” Sam said.
Ollie knew Sam was right, like usual. So, he reluctantly agreed and let his boyfriend help him out of bed. Not more than fifteen minutes later, the two exited Ollie’s apartment togetherand headed out toward the park, breaking into an easy jog to get warmed up.
Their route was the same every morning: a fairly flat three-mile loop that meandered through lightly forested trails in Lake Sammamish State Park and edged along the south end of Lake Sammamish before bringing them back to the apartment. Like every other morning for the last several weeks, the midsummer air was crisp but held the promise of warmer temperatures later in the day, the sun just beginning to peek up over the hills behind them. It was Ollie’s favorite time of the year and one of the many reasons he’d decided to move back to the Pacific Northwest, and specifically this region of Washington state, after he’d finished his doctoral program nearly a year ago.
As their pace increased into the second mile, Sam talked easily, carrying the conversation. Ollie listened, allowing Sam’s voice to distract him from that terrible place his thoughts wanted to go, as they always did after one of his nightmares. By the time they hit the final half-mile stretch back to his apartment, Ollie found himself grinning at Sam’s jokes and jumping in with a teasing comment here and there, the darkness that he’d woken up with having been buried just deep enough that he figured he could probably get through the day.
They rounded the final turn, and Ollie’s apartment came into sight—the last in a neat row of several two-story townhomes backing up to a densely wooded area about a quarter mile or so from downtown Issaquah. He twisted his head to look at Sam, and as their eyes met, he grinned.
“Not today, you don’t!” Ollie taunted, and he launched himself into a sprint, quickly pulling ahead of his boyfriend. He knew his lead wouldn’t last for long—it never did. Regardless, he pushed himself faster, not slowing until Sam caught up, passed him with a sideways grin, and moved out into the lead.
Sam reached the apartment just before Ollie, and Ollie slowed to a stop, then wrapped his arms around Sam’s waist, pressing himself up against his boyfriend’s back.
“Mmm, every time,” Ollie complained. “You can’t even just pretend to let me win? Not even once?”
He felt Sam’s laugh, and he let his arms drop from around Sam as Sam pulled his keys out of his pocket.
“Nope. You told me—”
“—never to hold back. I know. But maybe... maybe just once?”
Sam laughed again and then unlocked the door and held it open. “After you, love.”
Ollie paused long enough to stretch up and brush a kiss on Sam’s lips as he entered the apartment. Sam grinned, and as soon as the door closed behind them, Ollie wrapped his arms around Sam’s waist and reached up to kiss Sam’s lips again. The kiss didn’t last long enough, but it was Sam who pulled away first. He leaned his forehead against Ollie’s and let out a long breath.
“Why don’t you take the bathroom first while I make those pancakes?” Sam suggested, his voice thick with emotion and a clear reluctance.
Ollie closed his eyes and shifted his hands to rest on Sam’s chest, his fingers pressing into solid muscle hidden only by a thin layer of cotton. He nodded but didn’t move away. Instead, he lowered his head to Sam’s shoulder and let his hands drift down first to Sam’s hips and then around to his back.
“Oll?”
A light kiss pressed against his cheek, but Ollie still didn’t move. “Hmm?”
“Oll, you know I won’t...” Sam’s arms wrapped around Ollie, and Sam let out a shuddering breath, hot against Ollie’s cheek. “You should go... take a shower.”
Ollie could hear the yearning in Sam’s voice and feel the unmistakable evidence of Sam’s arousal. Running shorts hid nothing, even without considering that their embrace had brought their lower halves in much closer contact. And usually Ollie wouldn’t linger here, in this position. That wouldn’t be fair to Sam, since they both knew Ollie still wasn’t ready for intimacy.
But this morning, his usual inhibitions didn’t seem to be stopping him, and he found himself unable to pull away, still needing something else—that undefinable something he knew he would find in the comfort of Sam’s embrace. He shifted just enough for his lips to meet the sensitive skin of Sam’s neck, and he fluttered light kisses up to Sam’s jaw and then back down, the taste of Sam’s salty skin sending warmth radiating outward from his chest.
“Oll...” Sam groaned and tilted his head back, his arms tightening around Ollie as Ollie continued kissing a path down to the collar of Sam’s shirt. “God, love, that... feels so good,” Sam murmured, his hands slowly splaying out on Ollie’s back and caressing downward.
“Mmm,” Ollie hummed in agreement. He pulled back, his tongue darting out of his lips briefly as he raised his eyes up to meet Sam’s, and then he slid his hands up Sam’s chest to his neck, his fingertips tracing over the slightly damp skin he’d just been kissing. Sam groaned again and closed his eyes.
“Oll, love . . . You know I . . . God, I . . .”
