“And is the reason you took such offense because there is an underlying truth to the accusation?”
West asked the question in such a straightforward way that it took a moment for Ethan to realize the gravity of it. His shock must have shown on his face, for West continued as if he’d actually voiced the objection he felt.
“I’m not implying that you compromised her or were less than the gentleman I know you to be, but—Ethan, I saw you the next morning. Don’t try and deny that something occurred between you two in that cottage.”
Ethan placed his elbow onto the arm of the chair and leaned into his hand, propping up his head, too tired to fight the truth any longer.
“There may have been a kiss in the morning when we awoke beside each other, but it was nothing more than being caught up in the moment. Circumstances temporarily overrode good judgment, but it went no further. I would never treat Priscilla’s cousin with such little respect.” He certainly wasn’t going to share that Alice had initiated the encounter or that pulling away from her had nearly killed him.
West let out an exasperated sigh. “Ethan, I’m not worried about you displaying a lack of respect, you are a good man toyour very core. I’m just wondering why you seem so torn up about it when it appears no harm was done.”
Ethan squeezed his eyes tight and leaned further into his hand, trying to block out the image of Alice in her thin shift that was seared behind his eyes every time he closed them. How could West assert that no harm had been done when he was constantly dealing with this torture?
“It doesn’t matter. There is no possible way it could have gone further, and it never should have happened at all. She is here to prepare for her season and will soon be promised to someone better suited for her. I’m only distracted because we’ve been forced to work so closely together—and because she’s so goddamned beguiling,” he sputtered.
Leaning back in his seat again, Ethan saw West’s eyes widen at the confession he hadn’t meant to utter aloud.
“Beguiling, is she?” A twinkle was in his expression, and his lips twitched with suppressed glee. Ethan would never hear the end of it.
West swiftly sobered, then leaning forward said, “Ethan, if you care for her, she could be a good match for you, don’t discount her out of hand.”
“A good match! Have you gone mad?” How on earth could West think they would suit one another? “I’m not exactly the prize that Miss Pembroke’s father is seeking for her, and she’s accustomed to a lifestyle I do not in any way prefer.”
“What are you talking about? Yes, our family may not be as established as the Wrexham’s, but we still hold a high title. Why shouldn’t her father approve? My in-laws accept me.”
Ethan shook his head and looked at West incredulously. “Our situations are not in any way comparable. First of all, you are the one who holds the title, so of course you are a more acceptable match for a precious woman of the Wrexham clan. Second, Priscilla chose you without regard for her family’s wishes. Aliceis not the same—her father’s expectations are her guiding force. She has made that perfectly clear.”
“But if you care for one another, surely you can overcome?—”
“Overcome what?” Ethan wished fervently that his ankle was not troubling him, as he desired nothing more than to easily get up and leave this conversation. It was a futile endeavor. Alice had made clear her plans and wishes, and even if she was willing to work toward a solution, she still had expectations of a life that Ethan was not willing to return to.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to be snappish with you. I just don’t see a way forward, and belaboring the point doesn’t help me forget about her.”
West sat in silence for a moment before draining what remained of his scotch and setting the glass down with a thump. “I think you are not giving her enough credit and you are selling yourself short. You are a good man, Ethan, and any father worth his salt would be happy to have you as part of his family once they saw the joy you could bring their daughter.” Ethan gave a watery smile, not believing a word his cousin said.
“Alice is still discovering what is most important to her. I believe this is the first time she’s felt a sense of possibility. Let her decide what path she wants to go down—and just be open to the idea that it might be you.”
CHAPTER 21
After five days stuck in her room, Alice was finally free. Priscilla consented to a return of normal activity after her nose ceased running, and she and Knightly eagerly made their escape.
Slipping into the garden, she was delighted with the progress that had been made. The stone wall completely transformed the space, giving it set boundaries but looking much more natural than the brick which was becoming a more standard fashion. And as the plants grew and scaled the stones providing camouflage, the wall would appear as if it had always been there, that they were working harmoniously with nature rather than trying to tame it.
Trailing her fingers through the tall grasses which had been planted to add fullness and cover along the back of the wall, Alice wandered the grounds somewhat aimlessly with Knightly cheerfully bouncing about. She came up short, however, upon seeing a garden bed of distinctly star-shaped flowers at the base of a large, old oak tree.
Every feeling she’d been trying to repress rushed back—the sensation of warmth and security as Ethan had cared for her, how she couldn’t stop herself from kissing him, and theseemingly insurmountable chasm between them, knowing that he didn’t want the very things that were her duty to obtain.
“David went back and collected them a few days after the storm.”
Alice jumped at Ethan’s voice behind her, having been too caught up in her own thoughts to hear him approaching. She braced herself before turning around. Having not spoken with him since their return, she was determined to stay firm and leave any thoughts of him behind.
But as soon as Alice saw his kind eyes, she felt that resolve begin to melt away. “Ethan,” she acknowledged with a head dip. “They look wonderful, please thank David for me if you see him before I do.”
Ethan cleared his throat and shifted from foot to foot. “They do look pleasing. I hope they bring the new beginning you were desirous of.”
They gazed at one another for a moment, and Alice soon realized the awkwardness between them couldn’t stand. As much as she had told herself to maintain a polite distance in order to preserve her heart, she feared it might pain her more to cut him out of her life completely. She’d grown to deeply respect him and his convictions, the good he was trying to do. He was just as much of a friend to her as Nathalie, albeit in a completely different way.
Needing a moment to make sense of her swirling thoughts, Alice bent over and picked up Knightly, burying her face in his soft fur, granting her a minute to breath. She was startled to feel Ethan’s finger brush against her cheek but promptly recognized he was stroking the cat and had touched her only by accident. Settling the kitten against her chest, she looked up at the man who was now standing so very close.
