Moira sat back in her chair and smiled. “You must admit that he is a handsome man and sharing a life and home with him won’t be a hardship. Are you not attracted to him?”
“Moira!” Grace said, blushing again. “I will admit that he affects me, but that is hardly the only thing that matters in a marriage.”
“No, but it sure doesn’t hurt,” Moira said with a smirk. “That look earlier tells me you are indeed attracted to him, and he to you.” With her cheeks burning fiercely, Grace was sure she was practically scarlet by now. Serious once more, Moira leaned forward saying, “Look, of course there will be some challenges to such a match when you have unequal standing in society. But Henry makes an excellent argument. As a duke, he will be forgiven for almost anything. Come next season, once thetongets to know you, they will love you as much as we do. And if they want to stay in Carrington’s good favor, they will have little choice in the matter but to welcome you and accept your marriage. No, I think the only thing holding you back is your own insecurities.”
Moira paused and looked at Grace thoughtfully before reaching for her hand. “I still don’t know the story of all you experienced while we were separated, but it’s clear to me you have lost your confidence in yourself.” Gently, Moira continued, “You said you were not planning to marry again, but with a solid offer, why not take it? Other than my children, my marriage is my greatest blessing. Do you think a life with Carrington could be better than relying on others for a position?”
Moira was correct that Grace was holding herself back, but she was scared. For most, marriage would be a more attractive solution than working for another. But the experience of her previous marriage made her reluctant to enter another, no matter the circumstances. “Not all marriages are as good as yours, Moira,” Grace said. “This would not be a love match like you have with Fitz. It would be a marriage of convenience, and I need to consider it carefully in order to protect myself.”
“I understand,” Moira said gently, “but you yourself have admitted that Henry is a good man. And who is to say that love could not grow between you?” Grace’s expression must have shown she found the possibility of love highly unlikely, for Moira continued. “I was not looking for love when I met my dear Fitzwilliam. I was young and wanted to experience some fun before being tied down. I thought for sure I would have at least one full season under my belt before marrying.”
Moira now had a faraway look in her eyes, recalling the time seven years ago. “On the face of it, we were also an unlikely match. He was set to inherit an earldom and I was the daughter of a poor baron. He was nearly thirty when we met, and as a young girl of eighteen, I thought he was ancient,” she said with a laugh. “But he swept me off my feet and I quickly grew to love him. I believe Henry could win you over in the same way.”
“That would be the dream,” Grace admitted. “But reality has taught me that that is unlikely. Reservations aside, I can see how he is one of the best possible matches I could hope for.” She let the truth of that sink in for a moment, then shook her head. “But reality has taught me differently, and I just don’t know if I can relinquish control of my life to a man without knowing his intentions.”
For so many years, Grace’s life had not been her own. Now that she was no longer bound to anyone else, she did not know if she was willing to legally submit herself to someone else again. As Moira had pointed out, even though marriage was logically the easiest solution for security, Grace was not sure if it was something she could accept.
“Then tell him what you need to feel protected in the marriage,” Moira offered. “While this may be a marriage of convenience, you both stand to gain from the union, so go and talk with him. Treat this as a business deal. Negotiate terms that are acceptable to both of you and would allow you not to feel vulnerable entering an agreement. Tell him what you want in return for making his life easier. Embrace the power you would yield as a duchess.”
What Moira was suggesting made sense. While there were several things preventing Grace from feeling comfortable with the idea of remarrying, it was worth a conversation to see what a union between them could be.
What was holding Grace back from truly considering him was fear about what would happen to her if she once again had no say over how she lived her life. But if she could talk over everything with him as Moira had suggested, and he agreed to the freedoms she would ask for, she would be a fool not to consider his offer. Henry was a good man, and a life with him would be far more comfortable than living under employment to another. She needed to trust her own judgment and find the confidence she had lost over the years.
“I think I need to go and find him,” Grace said, clear on her next step. “I promised I would give him an answer tomorrow, but I need a few answers from him first.”
Grace placed the cat on the ground and stood to go find Henry, but before she made it off the porch, she was stopped by Mr. Stanhope.
“Ah, there you are, Lady Harcourt,” he said as he ascended the stairs from the lawn below. “I had hoped I would find you this afternoon. How about the walk you promised me this morning?”
“Oh, yes, of course,” Grace said. She had forgotten about Stanhope, her thoughts occupied by the duke. She did not wish to encourage him as he seemed to have grown an interest in her, but it never hurt to be polite, and she could not brush him off again. “Let me just go and grab my bonnet, and then I would be happy to join you on a walk through the garden.”
Moira looked on incredulously and shook her head.
CHAPTER18
Fishing truly was one of the joys of life. Watching Fitz instruct his children on the best way to cast their lines, Henry’s mind kept returning to the image of Grace nuzzling the cat. He wanted her to be nuzzling into his neck instead, as she had done while he carried her. It was amazing how she had taken over his thoughts completely in a matter of only days. Guiltily, he realized Miles was calling to him and, based on his tone, had likely tried to get his attention more than once.
Walking down the bank toward the stream, Henry joined the others so he could admire the fish Miles had caught while Fitz helped Emily hold her rod. After another half an hour, the children seemed to be flagging, so they tromped up the bank to rest under a tree where provisions had been left for them by Moira’s efficient staff. Henry smiled, his newfound appreciation for the services provided made him recognize and appreciate the prepared food in a way he wouldn’t have before and reminding him of Grace. He and Fitz watched as the children gobbled up a snack and promptly fell asleep, bellies full and warmed by the sun. Picking at the last of the summer fruit, Fitz turned his attention to Henry.
“What is going on with you?” he asked. “You’ve been distracted all day. Come to think of it, you’ve been acting odd practically since you got here.”
“I know, I’m sorry,” Henry said. “I’ve just been making some big decisions.” Shifting uncomfortably, he decided to be honest with his friend. “I think you were right the other day about needing to choose a wife sooner rather than later. This morning I asked Lady Harcourt to marry me.”
At Henry’s pronouncement, Fitz choked on the lemonade he was drinking. “I’m sorry, you did what now?” he spluttered. “You hardly know the lady.”
“I know I’ve not been acquainted with her long, but I do feel like I know her,” Henry insisted. “I’ve had a few long conversations with her over the past few days and I can see what a genuinely good, kind, and strong person she is. I think she would make an exceptional wife and would support me in my work to make improvements to the land and housing on the estates.”
“Are you sure you are not just in lust with her?” Fitz said, quirking an eyebrow. “I saw the look you shared with her earlier, you could practically cut the sexual tension with a knife. And from the accounts I heard, you were holding her rather closely on your heroic march across the lawn. Not to mention the way you looked at her while dancing last night.”
“I won’t deny that I find the lady beautiful and am attracted to her,” Henry said, “but such feelings hardly merit making someone my wife. No, she has many other attributes which I think make her perfect for my duchess.”
“Such as?” Fitz prompted. “What do you really know about her? Based on what Moira has told me, she hasn’t had an easy time of it and is desperate for some security in her life. You make an appealing target as a rich and handsome duke. Is it possible that she is trying to entrap you just as so many others here wish to?”
“She’s not like that,” Henry growled. Fitz held up his hands in a sign of submission while Henry continued. “It’s true she is not in the best position, but she resisted my proposal and still has not given me an answer. She’s convinced she doesn’t want to marry again and that she’s not a smart match for me if she were to say yes. You know I don’t give a fig about appearances,” he said to Fitz, who shrugged in agreement.
“She’s worried that if we did marry, she’ll bring my reputation down because she is not known within polite society,” he elaborated. “She doesn’t believe she’s worth anything because her family and late husband made her feel so through their neglect of her. She’s had no one to stand up for her . Even though she’s been raised as a lady and is the daughter of an earl, she has lost her confidence that she would know what to do as a duchess. . . But I see her, Fitz. I can tell she possesses the grace and empathy needed to care for the tenants, and she would have a firm command in running a household, if she could only believe in herself again. It takes a strong person not to crumble in the face of what she has had to endure.” Once again, Henry felt irritated and sad that poor treatment had made Grace so fully question her capabilities.
“That may be, but you said yourself that she’s in a rather desperate position . . . Does that not give you pause?” Fitz asked.
