But Aaron’s hand didn’t go anywhere even though he didn’t say anything until after the waiter had brought a glass filled with amber liquid and he’d sucked it down in record time, tossing it back like whatever was in it was water. He didn’t cough, he didn’t squirm,nothing.
I glanced over at the other end of the table to see Brittany and Des both watching him with a funny expression on their faces, and when they caught me looking at them, all I could do was lift a shoulder in a shrug, not wanting to take credit for leading Aaron to drink adouble.
When the hand over mine squeezed it one more time, he leaned to the side and whispered, “Come dancewithme.”
Uh. “Okay? I don’t really dancethough…”
“We’ll make it work,” he said, already pulling me up to my feet, his gaze so intense, I almost started toworry.
I nodded and followed behind him as he maneuvered between tables and toward the tiny area in the back with a dance floor empty now except for a single older couple, swaying together. This wasn’t exactly the type of atmosphere I danced in when I usually did. On the rare occasion it happened, it was usually on a crowded floor at someone’s wedding or party when everyone was too hammered to pay attention to what wasgoingon.
And this wasn’t a crowdedfloor.
But surprisingly, the instant that Aaron stopped at nearly the middle of the very small floor and reached out to me with both of his hands going to my waist, I stopped thinking. Stopped caring. Anyone could have been sitting there watching me and judging me and it wouldn’t have mattered in the least. With my stomach still feeling off about his reaction to everything that had been said and done over the last twenty-four hours, I was equal parts nervous and apprehensive to be so closetohim.
Mostly nervous though, even as my arms went up and my hands went to his shoulders. For some reason, linking them around his neck just seemed toopersonal.
And Aaron must have noticed because he shuffled closer to me, so close that our fronts grazed one another’s. I’d danced with enough men in the past, friends of my brothers and distant relatives to know that this wasn’t how itwasdone.
I stopped breathing and asked, “What are youdoing?”
For one brief moment, Aaron looked me right in the eye and then brought us even closer together, so close I could feel the side of his jaw at mytemple.
I wasn’t going to overanalyze him not wanting to make eye contact and bringing us so close together there was no way this wasfriendly.
Iwasn’t.
ButIdid.
Becausewhat the hell washappening?
“What are you thinking?” I tried not to hiss butfailed.
Something raspy touched my temple, and I didn’t imagine the sigh that made his chest meet mine. His voice was lower, hoarser, the words dragged and slow. “You really wanttoknow?”
Did I? “Not if it’s something bad,” I told him, just barely loud enough for him to hear me over the music, people’s voices, and the tinkling of plates andsilverware.
He made this chuffing sound that could have been a single laugh on the verge of tears. “Rubygirl…”
It was pathetic, but I pressed my forehead tighter in to him, knowing I had no right to, knowing I shouldn’t because there were a hundred reasons why this was a terrible idea, yet somehow making my grip more possessive, stronger. “Why are we so closetogether?”
“Because.” One of the hands at my waist tightened. “Iwantto.”
Istuttered. “Why?”
“Ruby,” was allhesaid.
Did he feel bad for me? Did he think I was an idiot? Was he doing this because hethought—
There were tears lurking in my eyeballs, all pathetic and too easy to trigger. But I still told him, “I don’t want you to think I was stupid.” I sniffled and felt tears clinging to my eyelashes. “I already beat myself up enough about it over the years. I know how dumb I was. I never planned on telling anyone because… I’d never met anyone I would want to tell.Untilyou.”
Ifelthis whole body go hard. Ifelttension fill one muscle after another in his incredible body. Ifelthim tip his face down and felt the breath out of his mouth hit the shell of my ear. The hands on my hips contracted even more and Aaron pulled me in closer, so close even I knew without a doubt that was something friends didn’t do. Ever. They didn’t have one zipper meeting another zipper. Friends with beautiful faces that you were in love with didn’t croak into your ear, “You’re not stupid. I don’t think that you’re stupid or dumb or pathetic, you understand me? Not even a little.” The fingers around my waist gave me an even tighter squeeze, and I was sure his lips brushed my forehead as we stood there, an unmoving island in this world. “I hate you thinking that of yourself, becauseyou’renot.”
And then he repeated for good measure, “You are not, Ruby.” His chest pressed closer to mine on another inhale and he said, “You’re the opposite of all those things. Every single one. You’re smart, you’re funny, you’re talented…” That mouth went to my temple again and just stayed there, whispering words directly into me. “You think I’ve forgotten about you and you’re ‘justRuby’shit?”
I just aboutchoked.
And he kept going, oblivious. “You’re beautiful, Ru. And you’re sweet and kind. You’re all those things you don’t think you are… all those things you think everyone else in your family is, and more. I didn’t understand why you couldn’t see that in yourself, but I getitnow.”
