It was. I knew it was, but as much as it scared me, their words only made me want to go so much more. Whether it was to prove it to myself, prove it to them, or neither one, I had no clue. All I knew was that I wanted to go, even more because I wasnervous.
But mostly because I wanted to meet Aaron, though it scared the heck outofme.
I wanted to meet him so I could get it over with and move on with my life, or so I told myself. I could see him and know that all I felt was friendship. I figured it would be like meeting a celebrity in person and seeing they were human instead of this imaginary, perfect person you had built up inyourhead.
And when my mom and sister showed up at my bedroom door after I walked out on them to start packing, I stood my ground as they still attempted to talk me out ofgoing.
I wasn’t going to budge. And I hadn’t, despite my stomach hurting and how unnatural it felt to not do whatever was in my power to please them. Because that was what I usually did. That was what came naturallytome.
Somehow, someway, I made it to the flight that Aaron had e-mailed me the details of not even two hours after I’d agreed to go to Florida, before I’d told anyone I lived with. Even leaving on bad terms with my mom, with her husband being the one to drive me to the airport because the two I was related to by blood were too pissed off to want to take me, I hadn’t been able tostopbeing excited. And scared. Mostly scared. Maybe fifty-fifty.
I was about to land in Florida, a place I’d been to a dozen timesbefore.
To vacation with my pen pal I was a little in love with and hisfriends.
There was no need tofreakout.
According to his last IMs, he and his friends were driving overnight and should have arrived at the beach house they were renting four hours ago. After that, he was driving back to Panama City to pick me up, and then we were going back to the house.I’ll meet you outside Arrivals, he’d messaged me. So we were meeting outside ofArrivals.
Hopefully.
Ihoped.
I reallyhoped.
This tiny part of my brain kept warning me to expect the worst. That maybe he wouldn’t show up. That maybe Aaron Hall didn’t exist. That I should be prepared for him not being there, and if he wasn’t, it wasn’t the end of the world. I could figure something out. I had a credit card. Maybe I didn’t have a lot of money in my bank account, but I had my credit card, and I’d gone to swap my coins for cash the day before and come out with almost two hundreddollars.
I was good.Iwasgood.
That’s exactly what I kept chanting to myself as the plane landed and everyone filed off. I lugged my weekend bag through the airport, so much smaller than the one back home, and stopped at the first bathroom I could find. I used it, but while I was washing my hands, I made the mistake of looking at myself in themirror.
I was awreck.
The light brown hair I’d been dyeing since I was fifteen had decided it was done being straight and wanted to resemble something out of a frizzy hair product commercial. The color I usually carried from lack of sleep under the blue eyes I’d inherited from my mom had decided to darken to an almost purple. And my mascara… I almost shuddered. Beauty was on the inside, I knew that, but a little makeup never hurtanyone.
After putting on a little more foundation, blush, and lipstick, and giving my hair a brush with my fingers, which had it looking decent again, I reminded myself that I was here for my friend and not for any other reason. I’d already told him I didn’t look like my mom or Tali. If he was disappointed in my appearance… I could get over it. I really could. I would. It wouldn’t be the first time thathappened.
I didn’t even believe that myself, but Ineededto.
Friends didn’t care what other friends looked like, unless this wasMean Girls, and it wasn’t. As long as we got along, that was all that mattered. Our friendship had been built on our personalities. Everything couldbefine.
Unless he wasn’t outside waiting for me… If that was the case, I wasn’t sure I’d everrecover.
A few minutes later, in baggage claim, my suitcase finally came around the conveyer and I picked it up, straining under the weight of 48.8 pounds of bathing suits and more clothes than I’d realistically need. Wheeling my bag behind me in one hand and clutching my weekend bag over my opposite shoulder, my heart rate started going crazy, so much I let out a deep exhale to try and calm it, but failed. Like usual. A knot formed in my throatanyway.
It wasn’t until that exact moment that I remembered Aaron had never sent me a picture of himself even though he hadmentionedit.
It was fine. Totally fine. I knew he was six foot two and that he’d have a hint of a Louisiana accent in his voice. I would figure it out. Two automatic glass doors went wide as I approached them, dumping me directly outside the building and atacurb.
And… there was no onewaiting.
At least there as no one waiting there that looked like a twenty-something man who had just spent the last year in Iraq. The only people hanging around were other passengers on my flight and two men dressed in black suits holding signs with names that weren’t Santosonthem.
I looked right, I looked left, then I took a deep breath. There was no need topanic.
Maybe he wasrunninglate.
Maybe he was at the departure entrance by accident and making his way over right thatsecond.
