“Oh my God, that was great.” Lucy’s still laughing as she lays a hand on my arm. “And don’t worry. We’re not keeping it secret or anything. The fact that we’re struggling to conceive?”
I must look confused because Peter continues. “Gotta rule out problems on my end, since Lucy’s been through this before.”
She nods at Luke, who somehow succeeds in keeping a straight face. “Luke joined us for the last family dinner. We all got to talking about it then, so I kinda assumed everyone knew.”
“I didn’t.” Add one more layer to my embarrassment. I should know these things about my cousin. Maybe not details like her husband’s appointment to ejaculate into a test tube, but I could have done something to support her fertility journey. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.” Lucy’s still snickering. “We kinda needed the laugh today. Don’t worry about it.”
But I do. Will Lucy and Peter feel bad when I turn up pregnant by accident? Luke’s fingers graze mine, though I don’t think he’s trying to hold my hand. He’s letting me know that he’s here, that we’re in this together. I shoot him a quick look of gratitude as my phone starts to buzz.
“Sorry, I should get this.” I slide a hand into my purse. “I’m negotiating a deal for—oh.”
Dammit.
It’s not work related at all.
Oregon State Penitentiary.
What does my dad want now?
Declining the call, I barely hear Peter’s next question.
“What brings you here anyway?” he asks as I type out a message to Dad through the prison’s electronic message center. “Making a donation?”
I confirm with a mumble, my eyes on the screen. “Mmhm.”
“Yes,” Luke says at the same time, and I snap my gaze up from my phone.
“That’s right,” I say, scrambling. “We both came to make a donation.”
Peter looks curious as he studies me. “Don’t you usually do your kind online?”
My kind of donation? “I like to meet with the foundation representative in person with larger corporate donations.”
“That’s lovely,” says Lucy with a smile. “I love how you’ve transformed your dad’s firm into such a charitable entity.”
“Thanks.” I glance at Peter, who’s trading a weird look with Luke. “What?”
“Just funny,” says Peter. “Both of you here making such different donations.” Whatever expression I’m making causes Peter to blanch. “Oh, shit.” He swivels his gaze back to Luke. “I’m sorry. You were so open about it when it came up at dinner. I thought?—”
“It’s okay.” Luke gives me a lopsided grin. “I don’t normally discuss sperm donation with the owner of the company I work for, but it’s cool. Hazel’s good with it, aren’t you?”
My tongue goes dry, and I realize my mouth’s hanging open. Snapping it shut, I paste on a smile. “Yes. Absolutely. Anything I can do to support employees who donate to help struggling families.” Did that come out wrong? “I don’t mean ‘support’ like I showed up to help Luke jerk off.”
Oh my God.
I did not just say that.
Even Lucy looks stunned. “I didn’t realize you two knew each other that well.”
“We don’t!” We both blurt it so quickly there’s not any question we’re lying.
And one thing I hate more than anything is lies. I hate lies of omission, lies of betrayal, even little white lies. As I stare at my cousin, I hate my own guts for lying to family. What kind of person am I?
One who’s about to be sick.
“Excuse me,” I say, clamping a hand to my mouth. “I need to?—”
