‘Always carry one thing on you. Please.’ When she still didn’t reply, he added, ‘For me.’
‘Fine.’
‘Promise.’
‘I promise.’ She would, too. Markus never asked for promises unless he absolutely believed he had to, and Nina respected that. He was trying to help in the only way he knew how, but instead of comforting her, his concern only made everything worse.
When tears burned her eyes for the millionth time in only seven days, Nina blinked, refusing to let them fall. It didn’t matter that she never cried them, though. Markus knew her, sometimes too well.
He took a step back and ran both hands over his head. ‘I don’t feel comfortable leaving you alone right now.’
‘Markus, I’m putting my foot down.’ She smiled, though it cost her immense amounts of what little energy she had left. ‘Look around,’ she insisted. ‘This place is perfectly safe.’
Markus did look, and she knew he saw what she did.
The cabin Alison, her agent, had reserved for her for the month was gorgeous. It was furnished luxuriously while somehow maintaining the rustic aesthetic. Thick, off-white knitted rugs lined the floor, heavy wooden furniture had been strategically placed to create a cosy atmosphere, and clever lamp stands sculptured from horseshoes added a homey touch. The kitchen, though she didn’t plan on using it, was fully serviceable. The bedroom was big and airy, with a California king bed she desperately wanted to sleep in – but wouldn’t. And the en-suite bathroom had a ginormous egg tub right by the floor-to-ceiling window – which she sincerely hoped was made from one-way glass.
Best of all, dozens of horses grazed in the pasture right outside her door. Nina could see them even then, outside her bedroom window, their heads down as they ate, tails swishing, ears twitching as they listened for any signs of danger.
‘It’s the safest you can be for now. Until they find him.’ He pulled her into a hug. ‘And they will.’
Nina didn’t bother arguing. What was the point?
She returned the hug.
Then she stepped back and said, ‘I’m fine.’
‘You’re a shit liar.’ But he tipped his head towards the door. ‘Walk with me.’
Nina started for the door.
Markus didn’t move.
He pointedly cleared his throat.
Nina sighed. But she went back to the bed and picked up the Birdie, slid it into the pocket of her overalls. ‘Happy?’
‘Appeased,’ he corrected.
He slid his arm through hers as they walked outside.
It was nearing five o’clock. A light breeze had picked up, causing Nina’s long hair to dance around her face.
She took a deep breath as she looked at Hunt Ranch under the glow of early evening. The irrigated horse pastures, bright green and lush with grass, faded into the rolling golden hills in the distance. Horses grazed. A flock of birds arrowed through the blue sky overhead. Somewhere close by, a child laughed.
‘Could you imagine living here?’ she asked. ‘Just waking up tothisevery day?’
Markus shook his head instantly. ‘Vacationing, yes. Working, absolutely. But living … No way. This boy needs city amenities.’
‘But it’s so quiet,’ she observed. ‘Peaceful.’
‘I live downtown.’ Markus shrugged. ‘Ambulance sirens literally lull me to sleep. And what would I do without bars and clubs? And restaurants. Oh, God, I’d have to learn how to cook.’ He patted her hand with genuine concern. ‘Are you sure you’re gonna be okay here for a whole month?’
‘Yeah … I think I’m going to enjoy it. I need it. Time away from everything.’
Although Markus couldn’t know how true that was, Nina meant it. She needed time away from her house and the memories there, time to decide if she could ever live there again. She needed time away from work, from the new fear that followed her. Because now that she understood real terror, she wasn’t sure she could act it anymore. And as much as she hated herself for it, she needed time away from Markus and his constant concern.
The exhaustion and shame weighed her down, and every time he tried to help, or tried to comfort her, she felt it rise in her throat, suffocating her.
