We pushed her hard last night. I insisted on it. I wanted her open and vulnerable today, needing my comfort. It would be the perfect opportunity to get closer to her and see how she reacts to me outside of play. And most importantly, I need to see how I feel about her in this new context—whether it’s just sexual attraction or we can connect on a deeper level as well.
But the little deer wanted to go home. She was very clear about it, according to Asbjörn.
With startling honesty, she had reminded him that she’s not ready for more than a little fun. I think she’s sensing there’s already much more going on here. I’m just not sure she’s fully aware that it’s me those emotions are directed toward, not Asbjörn. I think she’s too confused by everything that’s happening and the emotional upheaval she must beexperiencing to see clearly. I know my ability to see straight is slipping too.
“Is she dropping?” I ask when I pick up the phone.
“She is,” Asbjörn confirms. “Hard.”
“Are you good with me taking care of this?” I ask. The plan had been for us both to take turns if she stayed here. I know Asbjörn wants to take care of her too. But it will be too much for her if we both go to her place.
“Yeah, I’ll manage. But I’m not so sure she’s okay with this. She kept telling me not to come over—said she just needed to sleep. Same as always. Refusing any aftercare beyond what’s strictly necessary. But I could tell it was worse this time. Her voice was shaking, her breath staggered. She was on the verge of tears.”
My heart swells with concern even as anticipation buzzes in my veins. I’m already in the entryway, sticking my feet into my boots, getting ready to leave. “Tell her I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”
I don’t care whether she wants aftercare or not. The little sub is too heartbroken to know what’s good for her. Asbjörn told me long ago about her ex, and he has also told me how she’s been declining aftercare in the days after a scene, always saying she’s fine even though she’s clearly dropping. She’s been dropping more lately. I think it’s getting worse because she isn’t getting the aftercare she needs. And maybe it’s because of the confusing emotions building as I, little by little, insert myself deeper into her submissive mind.
Up until now, the drops haven’t been bad, which is why Asbjörn and I agreed it was best to give her space. Although she only told Asbjörn about her need to guard her heart a few days ago, we had both figured she was not ready for more.
But the little sub needs aftercare more than anything else today, so she’s getting it. I just hope it won’t be too overwhelming coming from me.
“She might just pretend she’s not home when you get there,” Asbjörn says. “She’s not deliberately disobedient, but I think the need to guard herself is stronger than any submission today.”
I sigh. It’s a fine line I’m walking with my wounded little deer. If I pounce too fast, she’ll retreat completely, and if I’m too slow, I risk losing her to someone else.
And there’s no in between. Either I claim her or I don’t. I encourage my men to take their time and be sure, but I’m the chieftain. I don’t want to waver and create uncertainty. So I watch from the sideline and wait until the time is right. But she’s sensing the waiting too on some unconscious level, and it’s starting to get to her.
Part of me just wants to end her confusion and tell her where this is headed, but I need to know for sure myself. And she needs to be ready.
I grab my jacket and tuck my phone between my ear and shoulder. “Tell her to let me in. If she wants to be part of our clan, she has to obey her chieftain. And remind her that her safeword applies both during and outside play. I won’t do anything she doesn’t want me to, but she has to let me in.”
I grab my car key and leave the house. “And remind her she can’t address me,” I add. I want more with her today, but I also don’t want to give her any doubts about the dynamic between us.
My pulse thrums with a premature rush of power. I can’t wait to have her in my hands again, seeing her submit so sweetly. I can’t wait to see if she’ll find the courage and finally give in to the intimacy I know she craves—the comfort I crave giving her.
A sliver of doubt enters my mind. Again, there’s that feeling that I can’t quite see clearly, and I wonder if I’m pushing toohard with this. Maybe I should send Asbjörn. A stranger barging in and insisting on giving her aftercare might be too much.
I shake my head as I leave the house. No, it has to be me. I’m the one she truly submitted to last night. I’m the one she truly needs care from. I know it in my gut. I know it in the way she lets me capture and hold her attention, the way her body softens every time she does, and the way she collapsed into full, utter surrender last night.
She might not be ready to admit that she belongs to me, but she needs my care to stabilize her.
Besides, I’m no stranger to her. I’ve watched her scream her lungs raw—from pleasure and pain. She’s felt me watching every time she played with Asbjörn at the club, and last night, she fully and directly succumbed to me.
Asbjörn’s regretful sigh billows through the phone as I get into my car. “I really hate how she refuses to open up to me.”
Guilt squeezes my chest. I think he’s getting attached to her.
I didn’t just choose Asbjörn because I trust him more than anyone else. I also did it because he’s the one least likely to fall for her. He’s gone years without a sub, not wanting to let anyone in. But what if Elina is the one who finally does it for him?
Letting the call go to the car speaker, I lean my head back against the seat and rub my eyes. Maybe I should step back and let him have her?
Her huge brown eyes flash before my inner eye, full of desire, submission, and longing as an unspoken bond tightens the strings connecting us. I’m the one she watches that way. Not Asbjörn. I just can’t give her up to someone else. But I need to think of Asbjörn too. Elina may not quite be ready for what I have in store for her, but she can get the rest of the way on her own.
“If it’s getting too much, you may step back after tonight,” I suggest.
“No,” he says without hesitation. “I need to finish what I started. I want to be the one to bring her to the next step. And I can’t bear the idea of her being alone until then.”
“She won’t be alone. Lea would be more than happy to provide some support. And Toke and Evelina have taken to her as well. She’s already becoming a part of the clan. I can let them know to—”
