"Frank wants me to talk to someone. He thinks I'm too grumpy, and it might hurt my chances of getting the promotion."
"I know how much you want that promotion. The hours are better for you and Sofia."
"I don't think I need to talk to anyone."
"I don't see how it could hurt. Sofia has a therapist, and you're always saying what a lifesaver she is."
I sighed, because I had said that. "I don't think I need help. I'm an adult. I should be able to process Marla's absence and move on."
"Everyone needs help sometimes."
I blinked away the sting in my eyes at that suggestion. "Frank wants me to have a date to the holiday party too. The owner of Christmas Town wants us to drive our trucks in the Christmas parade."
Mom nodded. "The Palmer girls. Which one was it?"
The one who looked hot in a red dress. "Eve."
"The younger one. They came home because their parents died. She might know a thing or two about grief."
Frank had mentioned there was an accident, but I didn't remember that. "Maybe."
"I've heard that they've taken over the town. Everyone is happy it wasn't closed down."
"I don't know anything about it."
Mom patted my shoulder. "I have a feeling you will."
How awkward would it be to be on a date with a woman I didn't know and my daughter?
"You're doing it for work. I'm sure Sofia will understand."
"I'm not ready to date," I persisted, the surliness coming out again.
Mom gave me a look. "Of course not, but if you were, no one would judge you."
I wasn't so sure about that. I was already judging myself.
In the kitchen, my brother, Tucker, was helping Sofia cut the carrots and place them into a bowl. It was good to be home and surrounded by family.
I'd had to move out of the home I shared with Marla. It was too hard to reside in the one we’d lived in when she was diagnosed with cancer, then withered away and died in. I thought starting over would be good for both of us. There weren't reminders and memories lurking in every corner. Sofia deserved a fresh start.
"Thanks for watching her," I said to Mom.
"We love having her."
She was their first and only grandchild, and they doted on her. Sofia was lucky to have them.
I sat at the counter, nursing a beer while they cooked dinner. Everyone was worried about me, but I was fine. I'd created a life that allowed me to breathe.
I couldn't even think about being happy or excited about anything. It was enough to be alive and to get through each day.
A woman like Eve scared me because she had expectations. She'd want me to be different. And I was very content with how things were now. I didn't want to change or move on.
Surely, I could survive one date. And I'd have Sofia there as a buffer. I'd tell the therapist what she wanted to hear and be less surly at work. Frank would retire, and I'd get his job. Everything was going to work out.
After dinner, we said our goodbyes, and I took Sofia home. This was when it sucked the most, coming home to an empty house.
Inside, I emptied Sofia's lunch box and got things ready for the next day while she took a shower. Then I tucked her into bed, wondering when it would get easier.
