She could hear the sound of his voice so clearly in her mind that she forgot for a moment he wasn’t actually there with her. Her eyes snapped open.
Oh God, how long has it been?
‘Excuse me, nurse.’ She looked round wildly for any sign of help. ‘Nurse!’ Her voice was strained in panic.
‘Yes, Alice, is everything OK?’ Someone was by her side. She didn’t even register their face; she just needed answers.
‘How long have I been here for?’
‘Erm …’
‘Tell me. How long?’ She didn’t care that she was practically shouting; she had to know.
‘It’s been just over a week, sweetie.’
No.
He can’t have gone.
Not without saying goodbye.
‘Has … has anyone been to visit me?’ Her heart was racing as her body tingled with anticipation.
‘No. The nurses from the rehab ward asked after you a lot. Actually, so much so that we had to ban them from coming up here. But apart from that, no one.’
He’d kept his promise.
She couldn’t even wait for the nurse to leave before the tears came.
‘Alice, what’s wrong?’
She buried her face deep into her pillow. ‘Nothing. Please just go!’ This was a private pain. It was all hers and she didn’t want anyone to bear witness to it.
‘OK.’ The nurse hesitated, lingering for just a moment. ‘You know where we are if you need us.’
*
‘Good morning, Alice.’
No. I don’t want to exist today, thank you. Let me lie here in the darkness and wallow.
‘The doctor has already paged me to say he’s coming down later to check on you.’
Why did the nurse sound so nervous?
‘It might be time to take off the bandages …’
‘OK.’ It was all the exhaustion would allow her to mutter.
‘There’s also someone here to see you.’
Instantly her body sprang to life. Her heart leapt to her throat and her stomach twisted in on itself.
‘Alice, baby, it’s me …’
Confusion and realization collided. It wasn’t him. But itwasher.
‘Nurse Angles?’
