"Not good enough; blackmail is not a safeguard anymore."
"Dammit, Denali, all I know for sure is I love you, and I don't want to lose you. But I can't go back to what we were. I wasn't holding it together too well to begin with, once I realized I was in love with you. And I'm tired of pretending."
His arms band around me tighter, and it's like he's trying to impart all of the love he's talking about through that touch. It's humbling, this outpouring from him, so rare and unexpected that I'd be a fool to turn it away.
"I promise you, I'm not going anywhere. You'll move in with me, of course, because I'm not letting you go back to that place knowing he can get in there?—"
"Kai, Ineedmy own apartment?—"
"Then I'll rent you one, here in the building, so that you'll have your own place, but you'll never be far."
I know damn well he's notthatrich. I mean, these places are ridiculously pricey. "I can't let you keep me like some secret mistress."
"So I'll take you out on dates. I'll make sure to tell the tabloids all about you, and let us be photographed together all the time. I'll post you on my social media. Men don't do that with their mistresses, and then it won't be a secret." He's thinking on his feet; I can see the gears turning in anticipation of the next question. "What else you got?"
"I—" I've actually got nothing. Well, aside from— "what happens if I get fired?"
"You won't." He's adamant, confident. I wish I could be that way about my paycheck.
"But if I am." It's possible, even if it's unlikely.
"Then I'll take care of you," he says with a shrug. "You're my girl, so if I cost you your job, it'll be my responsibility to take care of you."
"I'm not the kind of girl who enjoys being a kept woman, Kai." And I think he knows that. But it bears repeating.
"Then I'll hire you personally. I'll sign your checks, I'll write up a contract if you have to have one. Fuck, I'll even give you your own office, Denali. Just say you'll stay with me, yeah? Tell me you're as all in on this as I am, because I don't know if I'll survive it if you tell me you're not."
"What about Theo?" I ask quietly, wondering if he's thought about that side of things.
"What about him?" Apparently, Kai couldn't give a fuck less about the man who ransacked my apartment and keeps leaving threats everywhere for me. "Fuck him. I'll protect you, keep you safe. I've got security, I've got a defense system in the house, and we've got lawyers out the ass with the company—Denali, no matter what you try, I'll have an argument for it, okay? A goodone, too. Just—I'm not asking you for a confession or anything, okay? I'm just asking for you to let me love you."
I can't say no to him any more than I can say no to breathing. "Okay."
"Listen, I'm prepared to sit here all night and talk until I'm blue in the face to convince you to—what?"
Watching him come up short and stop on a dime is hilarious.
"I said, okay." My hips shift against his lap, and he groans as my grin spreads. His was contagious, I suppose. "Take me back to bed. If you're determined to keep me here with you, then I suppose I can spend a little more time in your bed. We don't have to be anywhere any time soon." It's our day off. His, as well as mine.
"Fuck, okay, yeah, yeah let's do that—" And then he's up, and I'm being carted off once more, this time in the direction of his bed.
I'm not sure how long we spend in there just getting to know each other intimately, our hands searching, eyes meeting over panting gasps and slow smiles, but it's long enough for the sun to rise and plant itself in the center of the sky, and for me to fall even deeper into delululand, letting him assemble a new reality out of my fantasy with real life building blocks.
And for once in a long while, I sleep the sleep of the dead, when we finally do pass out, because in his arms, I feel safe. Wanted. Loved.
Home.
It feels like home.
chapter thirty
Kai
Wakingup with Denali in my arms for the next two days is heaven on earth. And then life comes along and crashes in like a wrecking ball, ruining the solitude we'd been enjoying with each other on our days off.
Currently she's standing in my room, naked except her underthings, holding up two separate but equally attractive dresses for me to look at.
"I don't know, Kai," she mutters, eyeing herself in the mirror for the hundredth time. "I can't pick which one."
