“Just need is an ice pack.” An ice pack and another go at Rick.
Can’t believe I let him get in a shot. Six months ago that wouldn’t have happened. My reflexes have gone to shit, thanks to my broke-ass brain. Or maybe it’s the booze. Hell, it’s probably both.
I gingerly sit on the mattress and recline back, careful to keep my head turned to the side so I’m not lying on my lump. “There’s some ice in the freezer and some sandwich bags on top of the fridge. Mind making a couple of ice packs?”
Her face is blanched of color and she’s trembling all over. I can only imagine what it must’ve looked like when Rick nailed me and I went flying.
“Never mind the ice packs. Come here.” I pat the edge of the mattress.
“But—”
“Come here, Maggie.”
When she sits, I hesitate for a second, but then I make myself take her hand in mine—touching her is always equal parts pleasure and pain. Pressing the back of her hand against my chest, I see the symbol tattooed on the inside of her wrist.
Ten years ago, I promised to love her to infinity and back again. I wasn’t lying. I loved her then. I love her now. I’ll love her until the day I die. And if there’s an afterlife, I’ll love her there too.
“It’s okay, Maggie,” I assure her, chafing her arm as if it’s chills making her shiver instead of shock. “I’m okay. I promise.”
Her lower lip quivers ever so slightly. She sucks it between her teeth, blinking quickly. And then, when she can’t hold it in a moment longer, she bursts into tears.
Her reaction is so…Maggiethat I find myself chuckling.She’s tough as nails one minute, standing up to Rick like a virago, and then soft as silk the next.
“And now the dam’s busted.” I pull her beside me, pillowing her head on my chest. I breathe the smell of her shampoo into my lungs to make her a part of me if only for a while.
“I’m s-sorry,” she sniffles. “I don’t know why I’m crying.Ididn’t get hit by my father.Youdid. And it wasawful.How could he do that? How could he hurt his own flesh and blood? How could he—”
She stiffens against me before bolting upright. Her cheeks are shiny with tears, her eyes wide. “That wasn’t the first time, was it?”
I close my eyes, not wanting to see the instant all the puzzle pieces snap into place. Of course, there’s no way to avoid her words short of shoving my fingers in my ears and singingla-la-lalike a petulant child in the throes of a tantrum.
“All those times you showed up with a new bruise or a bloody nose or…” I blink open my eyes when she smoothes a finger over the scar cutting through my eyebrow. “I thought it was you being you and getting into another scrape, buthedid this to you, didn’t he?”
“Ididget into a lot of fights,” I say through gritted teeth.
“To cover up what was happening at home?”
For a long time, I don’t move. Don’t speak. Pressure builds in my chest and behind my eyes.
She doesn’t need me to say the words. She can see the truth in my face, and fresh tears spill over her bottom lids. “Why didn’t you eversayanything? I could have helped you. I could have—”
“Didn’t want you to look at me then like you’re looking at me now.”
She shakes her head helplessly. “How am I looking at you?”
“With pity.”
Her face crumples, and her arms go around my neck. Being held by Maggie is to know what it is to be truly held. She commits. Her whole body clings and comforts. I can feel her heartbeat. My own matches its rhythm.
“It’s not pity,” she whispers. “It’s me finally seeing past all the bull crap to the realyou. The good and the bad. The pretty parts and the ugly parts you’ve tried to hide from the world.”
Her words have the pressure in my chest and behind my eyes erupting like a volcano. A hard sob shakes me. It shakes us both.
She holds me tighter. Squeezes herself against me as if she wants to press her strength into me. She might be a little thing with a big, squishy heart, but in all the ways that count she’s the strongest person I know.
Don’t know how long we stay this way. My tears dropping into her hair. Her arms hugging my neck. But eventually, I become all too aware of her soft breaths puffing against my cheek and her warm curves so tantalizing close to my fingertips.
“He really was the reason you left, wasn’t he?” Her voice is hoarse. “I thought it must’ve had something to do with me. But you told me the truth right from the beginning, didn’t you? You saw your chance to get away from him and you took it.”
