The omega didn’t seem to listen as he continued to study my face. “Are you hurt?”
Yes!I wanted to scream.Yes, I’m hurt. Hurting. I’ve lost my heart, my love, my person.But instead, I just shook my head, until I bumped into something hard and a pair of strong arms wrapped around me from behind.
“It’s okay, Gus,” Hal soothed. “I’m here. I’m sorry I left you. Let’s go home.” My legs nearly gave way underneath me with relief.Hal.
“Is your friend all right?” The omega asked Hal, worry evident in his voice.
“He will be. Thank you, sir. I’m sorry for any inconvenience. My friend meant no harm, sir.”
“Very well.”
“Come on, Gus. Let’s go home.” Hal squeezed me tighter, but his words carried no comfort.Home.When they’d first taken me away to the palace, I’d wanted nothing more than to go home to the farm, to Hal. But now the word had lost its meaning. I had no home. I had no home without him, without my Seb.
Chapter 21
Sebastian
“What are you doing out here?!” Briar called, running toward me, his blond curls flying around his face.
I sat on one of the benches in the garden, enjoying the peace. No one was outside during the winter, so I found my escape in the cold. I rarely noticed it anymore, though, my body so numb that not even the harsh winter air seemed to affect me.
“I just needed some fresh air,” I lied smoothly.
Briar huffed and sat down next to me. The small omega was shivering even with his huge coat on. I was constantly overheating, which was normal during pregnancy, according to my book, but not even the hot flashes seemed to affect me; nothing truly did anymore. I was merely surviving.
“Is it my father again?” Briar asked, his tone sad.
Clive wasn’t my favorite advisor at the moment, and I hated that Briar had to witness just how nasty his father could be. I was too tired and drained to truly put up a fight against them, so when they’d made a fuss over not being able to firemy employees anymore, I’d asked them instead to make me reports to justify why a certain palace worker should be let go. I regretted it the moment I received all their bickering complaints in written notes on my desk.
“Not just him,” I sighed deeply. “They’re old-fashioned and fail to see that the world around them is changing.”
“But isn’t change good?”
I smiled. “I think so. Without change, we remain the same, and I, for one, want to become a better version of myself.”
“I do, too,” Briar agreed.
“Are they looking for me?”
Briar shook his head. “No, but they will soon. Nicholai is actively looking for the next alpha to breed Elias.”
I sucked in a breath. “Elias’ son hasn’t even celebrated his first birthday yet!”
Briar only nodded in agreement, a sad look on his face as he stared down at the snow-covered ground. “Elias is hiding in his room.”
“Don’t worry. I won’t let them force him into another pregnancy.”
Why Nicholai even thought it necessary was another thing. Elias had told me about his alpha and that he trusted him. He’d also mentioned that his father had threatened to fire him, and yes, he was one of the alphas they tried to fire, but I’d rejected each of their attempts. Was this a punishment for Elias? Or for his alpha? Because they’d gotten too close?
“Go inside and get warm,” I ordered gently. “I just need to read three more pages, and then I’ll find Elias.”
“Okay,” Briar agreed and hurried down the snow-covered trail. I smiled regretfully as I opened my father’s old journal again. I was pleased I’d allowed Briar to forego my title and talk to me like an equal, since it felt…nice to be addressed by name and not as the king.
December 21st
Father just left to find my alpha. The future alpha father of the heir. My future son. It pains me to admit that I stayed inside my chambers and filled my stomach with nothing but wine. I was nervous. Father had announced he’d find an alpha who lived far enough away to not be a bother when the deed is done, which means Father will be gone for a while. I should be overjoyed, but instead, I was left shaking on the bathroom floor, my mind a worried mess and my heart aching with fear and trepidation. I will soon carry an heir. The magic will be passed on to my son, the next generation. Or, as I’ve come to view it over the years, the curse that was handed to me at birth will now be forced on another poor, innocent child.
I took a shaky breath as I realized I was in the same situation as my father. Only this time, I would be cursing two children. The babies kicked in my stomach, and I rubbed my belly. Would they carry the burden together, or would one be the less fortunate, the cursed one?
