“Why I move the way I do.”
Her lips twisted. “Because you like control. We talked about this. Or maybe it’s because… you just don’t know how to be… normal.”
I nodded once. “Valid guesses.”
She rolled her eyes. “Oh, so now you’re self-aware.”
“I’ve always been self-aware,” I said. “That’s the problem.” Silence sat between us before I broke it. “My mother was the first and only woman to break me,” I said.
Princess froze.
“She didn’t love me,” I continued, voice steady even though my chest burned. “She loved whatever she could get her hands on. Drugs. Men. Money that never lasted. I was just something she dragged along.”
Princess’s sarcasm vanished.
“She used to pawn me off on strangers when she wanted to disappear for days. When she was high, she forgot I existed. When she was sober, she hated that I did.” My jaw clenched. “If I didn’t bring her something she could sell or use, she would kick me out. I slept in stairwells, abandoned cars, and hallways of buildings where nobody asked questions.”
Princess’s eyes filled, but she stayed quiet.
“One night she owed a nigga some money she couldn’t come up with,” I said. “And she decided I was the payment.” Her breath hitched. “She told me to go with him and to stop crying because shit wasn’t that serious.” My hands curled into fists. “I fought him harder than I ever fought anybody. I got lucky, got his gun, and pulled the fucking trigger on both their asses. I was twelve.”
Princess covered her mouth, and her eyes widened in shock.
“One of the OGs from my block found me before the cops did,” I continued. “He took the blame and took the charge, saving me from prison. But nothing is free.” I met her eyes. “That was the day I stopped being a kid.”
She was crying openly now.
“I grew up fast, Princess,” I said. “I learned how to survive and how to never be weak. I learned how to never need anybody for too long. That’s how I’m still alive.”
She rushed to me then, wrapping her arms around my neck, burying her face in my chest. “I’m so sorry,” she sobbed. “I am so sorry you went through that.”
I held her, but my body stayed stiff. “I ain’t built right,” I said quietly. “I know that, but I have to be this way to protect myself. I don’t let people get close because closeness costs too much. Love is a dangerous fucking thing.”
She pulled back, tears streaking her face. “But I’m different.” I closed my eyes. “You know I am,” she whispered.
I did, and that was the problem. I leaned down and kissed her lips. “Go shower,” I said against her lips. “Get dressed.”
She blinked, briefly pulling away from me. “For what?”
“I wanna take you somewhere,” I said. She nodded slowly, still emotional, still unsure, but hopeful. I’d just let her in my world, so I figured, why not keep going?
???
Tuesday | 2:25pm
The city was alive by the time I hit the main streets. Princess sat quietly in the passenger seat, hands folded in her lap.
She’d showered and slid into a pair of high-waisted jean shorts, a flowy top, and designer slides. She’d made her hair curly.Fuck. Why’d she do that shit?She looked beautiful as fuck. Those damn glasses got me. My hand sat on the gear shift, tapping slowly. The ride was smooth, with soft jazz she insisted on playing filtering through the speakers.
She finally looked over. “So where are we going?” she asked, voice low.
“You’ll see.”
She sighed. “You really like to control everything.”
I smirked a little. “I think that’s what you like about me. You just won’t admit it.”
She rolled her eyes, but I caught her trying not to smile. We cruised in silence for a few before she leaned her head back against the seat. “So what now?”
