Jesus, he hoped that was true.In his most desperate hours, he’d clung to that like a lifeline.And the hope that he’d at least spared Peyton and the other wounded man with him more needless suffering.When the end came, it had been quick.
Willow continued, her voice soft.Soothing.“I don’t know what Peyton went through in his final moments, but I do know he would have wanted you to complete the mission.He would have wanted to make his friends’ deaths mean something, and prevent those weapons from being used.That’s why he said what he did to you over the radio.He knew what had to be done, and he accepted it.”
Tripp scrubbed a hand over his face, sucking in an unsteady breath.She was saying everything he’d been beyond desperate to hear, but...
“Not only that, he wouldn’t have wanted you to punish yourself for it.Or for you to suffer like this.No, look at me, Tripp.”
He steeled himself and turned his head toward her, the wetness on her cheeks hitting hard.She’d been through too much.He wanted to protect her from anything and anyone who would ever dare hurt her, and he’d just caused her more pain.
“He wouldn’t have wanted any of this for you.He would have hated it.You know he would have, and I don’t want it for you either.My brother loved you, and I know you loved him.You would never have ordered the strike unless you believed you had no other choice.”
She peered deep into his eyes as she continued.“He would want you to forgive yourself.So if you really want to honor him and the others, you can do it by letting all that blame and guilt go and start living your best life.”
Tripp’s jaw worked.Eyes stinging, his voice was low and raspy when he spoke.“And what about you?Can you forgive me?”
“Yes,” she said without hesitation.“Because there’s nothing to forgive.”
He sucked in a breath, a ragged sob tearing free as a tidal wave of emotion crashed over him.Gratitude.Grief.Relief so intense he couldn’t breathe.Hearing those words from her unlocked something deep inside him.Freeing him from the heavy chains he’d been trapped in.
Willow made a soft sound and stroked his hair, holding him close.And in that moment, he believed in miracles.Believed that he might finally begin to heal, all the broken, jagged pieces of his soul starting to knit back together.
She kissed the side of his head, her lips resting close to his ear.“Iloveyou, Tripp.And I don’t want you to hurt anymore.”
He squeezed his eyes shut and crushed her to him with a choked sound.
Christ.Her forgiveness and love were more than he deserved, but everything he’d longed for.She was his light in the darkness.“I love you too.I’ve loved you forever, Will.”
“Then forgive yourself, so we can build a future together.I need you to do that, Tripp.Please.For us.Can you do that?”
He nodded, wanting that with every fiber of his being.“I’ll try.”
“Thank you.”She took his face in her hands, smiled at him through her own tears, and kissed him.“Tripp?”
“Yeah, sweetheart?”
“How’s your arm?”
“It’s...great.”
Her heart squeezed at the little show of humor.“Good.”She lowered her voice to a whisper.“Take me to bed, Tripp.Right now.”
He huffed out a laugh and stood, holding her against his chest as he carried her to her room.
