The name hits me like a punch to the sternum. For a second, I forget how to breathe. “Ivy?”
“There are three messages from her. Do you want me to read them for you?”
“Is that even a real question?” I chuckle, a nervous buzz filling my entire being. “Of course I want you to read them!”
“Okay. First one,” she says, clearing her throat a little. “I saw the press conference. You were remarkable. Brave and honest in a way most people never manage in their whole lives.”
My grip tightens around the cane resting across my lap. Hearing from the woman I can’t stop thinking about is both thrilling and bittersweet. I crave for more. Ineedmore of her words.
“Leave it to Ivy to say the one thing I didn’t know I needed to hear,” I murmur, still amazed that she finally texted me.
Em continues, softer now. “I can’t imagine how hard today must’ve been, but I’m proud of you. So damn proud. You should know that.”
I lean my head back against the seat, a harsh breath leaving me. It’s Ivy. It’s really her. Pride instead of pity. That’s all I ever wanted from her.
“Keep going,” I say, waiting for what's next.
“I miss you, Theodore. So fucking much. I’ll be back home after the final race on the 22nd. Wait for my call, okay?”
The car hums around us, but it’s drowned out by the happiness bubbling inside my chest. Not sure what else to say, I whisper, “She truly misses me.”
Em reaches over, squeezing my arm in comfort. “Yeah. She does. You’ll also see her soon.”
“I’ve been waiting for this, counting days, you know.”
“And what happens next?” she prompts.
“I’ll get my woman,” I say, a shaky smile tugging at my lips. “She’ll finally be all mine.”
For the first time since I left the press room, the thought of what comes next doesn’t scare the shit out of me. Because I know Ivy will be by my side.
“Ivy texted me yesterday. She’ll be back next week.” The words rush out of me as soon as I sit on the couch in Mel’s office the following afternoon. “Because her season ends tomorrow in Lake Placid.”
I press my hand flat to my bouncing knee, grounding myself against the sudden tight-chested feeling of being on the edge of what truly matters.
“How does that make you feel?” my therapist asks, unsurprised that I’ve brought up Ivy again.
Taking a deep breath, I try to calm my excited heart, but it’s no use. “That’s a good question. Before now, it felt like she was on the other side of a frozen lake. I could sense her standing there, but I had no idea if the ice between us would hold or if I was going to fall through trying to get across. But her latest messages gave me new hope, like the ice has finally thickened enough to carry me across.”
Mel taps her pen on her notebook. “What do you want from Ivy?”
“I don’t know,” I say automatically. Then I shake my head. “No. That’s not true. I do know. I want there to be anus. I’m not expecting her to run into my arms or confess she loves me. Iacknowledge that we’ve changed since meeting each other and in the time apart. If we try to be together, it has to be rooted in who we are now. We also have to work on our communication outside the controlled environment of the hospital.”
“What makes you believe it could work this time?”
“Because I love her.” My answer comes easily. It’s the first time I have said them aloud to anyone, outside the voice memos. And I still mean every syllable.
“I love her,” I repeat, softer this time, a relieved smile on my face. “She’s the first person I want to talk to in the morning and the last in the evening. Hell, I want to share every single thought in between with her, too.”
“You are worthy of love, Teddy. Don’t ever forget it,” she points out, making me smile wider. “Outside of Ivy, what comes next?”
“I’ve decided to leave rehab tomorrow morning. My surgery is next week and I want to enjoy life outside these four walls before it. Dr. Royce confirmed that I could take the time off when I called him earlier today.”
Mel hums. “That sounds a lot like progress, don’t you think?”
“It is,” I agree, more excitement bubbling inside me as I get a new idea. “And I’ll be out of town for a night or two.”
“For what?”
