“You have changed.” A smile touched his lips, as if he was proud. But he smothered it and turned stern again. “And I am so proud of you for it. Ironically, because you have changed, perhaps this marriage is no longer feasible.”
“Gabriel…” Her chin began to wobble, and she wanted so much to go to him. But doing so would do her no good. She knew that now.
“I am sorry, Sophia.” He sounded like he meant it. “I never wanted to hurt you. But you deserve someone who is capable of feeling… who has access to such emotions as that. It simply isn’t me. I’m sorry.”
They stood across the foyer from one another; a distance of maybe ten feet but it felt like double that. Gabriel stood tall, hands by his side, and there might as well have been a brick wall in front of him for how unreachable he looked.
Sophia was breaking inside. The truth… she had expected it. She had known her questions would lead there. But there was a part of her that hoped it might be different because as much as she had changed, she knew too that Gabriel had also. Even if he refused to admit it.
“What now?” Sophia said.
“I am not sure.”
She sniffed back the tears and nodded once. “You are right, Gabriel. This marriage was for a singular purpose and now that this purpose has been served I…” She choked on the lump in her throat, barely able to swallow it back. “I do not see the point in my staying here.”
“You’re leaving?”
“Unless you can think of a reason for me not to?” It was a final plea. A final chance for Gabriel to understand where this was going and to stop it.
If he does care for me, this is it. Somewhere, deep inside, I know he does, and right now I need him to realize it. To accept it. To admit who he really is.
“No…” He looked away. “There is no reason. I promised you freedom and this is it. You are…” He cleared his throat. “You are free to go. I will not stop you.”
Sophia wanted to cry, but she did not want to do it in front of Gabriel. Her tears would have no effect on him and would thus be a waste. More than that, she didn’t want her tears to be the reason he changed his mind.
“As you say…” Sophia pointed her chin and looked upon Gabriel for the last time. It was a look that a stranger might give to someone who entered their home, dismissive and unsure. Gabriel found her eyes, matched it in kind, and that was his final response.
Sophia turned and walked away. Slow up the staircase, was there a chance that Gabriel would call out to her? Maybe… but he did not take it. He watched her go, surely knowing that once she did there would be no turning back.
That he did not stop her was proof enough that this was the right decision. Sophia’s marriage was over, and it was time she accepted it, moved on from it, and started her life anew.
CHAPTER 26
It took Gabriel longer than he was proud to admit that he had made a terrible mistake. But that just spoke to how stubborn he was.
Sophia left his home the same night that he told her this marriage had reached its end point, and he worked as hard as he could to convince himself that this was the right decision. The only decision, as he saw it.
She knew what this marriage was. She agreed to it! Why now? Why did she have to complicate things? This is her fault, not mine!
He went to bed that night with a forced smile on his face. Again and again, he repeated in his head the conversation they’d had, determined to believe that he had done nothing wrong. Things were going so well, they had both seemed to understand the place they were in, and there had been no need to try and escalate.
In fact, Gabriel was convinced that she wanted him to shut her down.Yes… that is why she had said those things. She did not want more from this marriage, and she feared that he might, so she knew that by broaching the topic that he would have no choice but to deny her and force her to leave.
In many ways, he was doing her a favor…
The smile he wore as he went to bed did little to make him feel better, and it certainly did little to provide him a good night of sleep. He tossed and he turned, unable to escape the look of utmost heartbreak and pain that his wife had worn the last time he saw her.
Even still, when he woke the following morning, Gabriel managed to convince himself that things were for the best. He rose with the sun, he bathed and dressed himself promptly, he then made his way to the breakfast room with a view that as the day wore on, he would feel better about his decision. He had to.
It was when he reached the breakfast room that everything changed.
There was a single place set at the head of the table and at the sight of that singular setting, Gabriel balked. He stumbled back. A cold sweat broke across his brow and he started to shake.
Ordinarily, Sophia would be awake by now. She would either be here waiting for him, or he would be able to hear her getting ready. It was surprising, the difference that a single person could make in a house, how much fuller it felt with just the one morebody drifting through. That body was gone now, and its lack of presence was startling.
You are imagining things… reaching for answers that you do not need. You are happy that she is gone – damn thrilled! This is best for the both of us.
Gabriel forced himself to take a seat. Just as he forced himself to pretend that everything was normal. Not so long ago, this was common, and Gabriel had coveted his private time as if it was gold. He liked being alone. He liked being able to do as he pleased, not having to think about anybody else. This is who he was!
