“Mason, get me the fuck out of here!” she yells at him.
“I’m working on it, I promise. Livy, this will be okay.”
I smile at their exchange, especially when Liv replies. “Babe, I need you here, holding my hand and telling me I can do this.”
“I know and I need to be there too, and I will be, soon.”
She does her squeal thing again. Yeah, this is not attractive. Maybe it’s better that Mase isn’t seeing this, or my niece would certainly be an only child.
“Dec.” His attention is on me now. “I know I said I didn’t want you playing midwife, but you may have to. Livy’s contractions are speeding up and I can hear they’re becoming more intense. There is an ambulance on the way, but in the meantime, I have a lady from the ambulance service on the line.”
The next ten minutes pass by in a blur. Liv is propped up the corner and I have now seen her lady parts. Her contractions are almost constant, and I can see the baby’s head doing something I now know is called crowning. The ambulance crew have arrived, as have engineers and the fire brigade. On one side we have the noise of people trying to get to us and on the other is the woman directing me and Liv on how to get my niece out. We also have a side order of anxious dad giving advice and muttering curse words.
I watch as Liv has another contraction, and the head begins to emerge.
“Fucking hell! I can see her. Her head is coming out! What do I do?” I am well out of my depth here but am also emotional to see this little person entering the world. Even the sight of Liv and her lady parts is no longer looking as traumatic. This moment is fucking amazing, and I feel privileged to be witnessing it, no, sharing it.
The woman is telling me to support her head but not to pull! She is talking about the shoulders, and I am panicking inside that I may break my niece as she enters the world.
Liv looks at me and smiles. She can see or sense my turmoil.
“Uncle Dec, we have got this. You wouldn’t have been my first choice to do this with, but maybe you should have been. You’ve been amazing.”
“Don’t turn mushy on me now, Liv.”
I am genuinely touched by her words and the sentiment of them, but I need not to get emotional because if I do, I will go to that place where I missed my own daughter being born and then I will inevitably end up imagining Anita doing this, going through this, only to give up the baby she loved and in other circumstances wanted. A baby she would have been an amazing mother to if the father had been different.
“Liv, I want a baby,” I blurt out.
“That is not on the fucking table!” Mase hisses at me, making me laugh.
“Not with Liv, you dickhead.” I look at Liv again, “No offense.”
“None taken.” She smiles briefly before another contraction hits. She knows what I am saying.
Her scream is kind of blocked out by Mase shouting something about being on his way and the sound of metal scraping and then light hits us from outside of the lift. We have barely moved from the apartment. The men opening the lift are visible from just above the knees down.
The lift is suddenly filling up, paramedics appear a split second before Mase and before any of us know it, Liv is crying out again and I am literally catching a baby that resembles a bar of wet soap judging by how slippery she is in my grasp.
Her cry is the best sound ever. She is beautiful with dark hair and perfectly pink skin. I feel tears running down my face.
“She is fucking perfect. My little angel.”
The paramedics intervene. I have no clue how long it takes but suddenly my brother is cutting my niece’s cord while I hold her, both of us sobbing more than the baby and then she is being moved onto Liv who is also crying at the sight of her desperately wanted and loved little girl.
I get to my feet and look down at the sight of my brother holding his wife while she cradles their firstborn child and the phrasea picture paints a thousand wordsreally makes sense. They are a perfect picture of happiness and love. I want that too. I had that and I threw it away because of my own ego and hurt.
“Liv, I want a baby.” My repeated words make her grin up at me.
“Then go.”
“What?” Mase is confused.
“I told you, Anita is leaving, and I can’t let her. I love her and I need to listen to her, then most likely beg her to forgive and try again.”
Mase frowns. He is still holding the grudge I am determined to let go.
“I. Love. Her. More. Than. Anything.” Punctuating each word seems to get my message across.
