Overcome, my eyes closed, and I whispered, my voice thready and weak, “Well, if you want to stop this freight train, we better get busy with something else.”
He chuckled, offering me his hand as I struggled off the tailgate and slipped to the ground. “Walk down with me to the river.”
Now that I’d kissed Jesse, I could actually focus on our surroundings. Beyond the grassy drive, rippling roots and large rocks lined the banks of the Guadalupe river. The water itself glistened in the sunshine, glowing green. When the soft rustling sound of water reached my ears, I smiled.
Jesse reached over, entangling his fingers with mine. “When Cade was six, I needed to get off the ranch for a little while.” I lifted my dress with my free hand, stepping over a root that had jutted over the surface of the earth. “I figured fishing would be a good activity for us that wouldn’t take too much of my energy because I was barely keeping my head above water those days. So I drove up and down the river until I found this spot.”
“I love it. It’s so quiet. Do you catch much here?”
“Just enough to justify trying.”
We came to the edge of the river and I dipped my toe, the leather of my sandal turning dark as the warm water soaked in. My paintless toe nails looked white as I plunged them into the flow. “You know, I don’t think the girls have ever been fishing.”
“Really? Bummer. We should’ve brought them out.”
I giggled at that. “I’m trying to imagine Nora being quiet enough for fishing.”
Jesse chuckled too. “When Cade gets talking, he can’t stop. I—” Laughter choked off his words. “This might be terrible. But I told Cade when he was little that the bass in this river have bionic hearing, so talking even one time would scare them all away.”
I barked a laugh at that. “Did it keep him quiet?”
“Surprisingly, yes. I love talking to him, but when he was little, I needed space where I didn’t have to parent too much, and I could just think and process. Casting a line helped for some reason. Eventually, I was able to tell Cade that talking wasn’t allowed while we fished, so he had to zip it or stay home.”
I smiled. “I love knowing this about you.”
He shrugged. “How did your conversation with the girls go, by the way?”
I moved my hand to Jesse’s arm, lightly gripping him for balance as I slipped off my sandals. Gritty dirt pressed into the soles of my feet. “Well, I didn’t tell Nora much. She’s so hurt right now, that this layer would only make everything more confusing. I told her you wanted to take me to dinner and spend time with me before we left. She said ‘ok’ and went back to playing. Izzy had a lot of questions, and we had a great conversation about the future, her dad, and us. She was surprisingly onboard with everything.” I looked up at him, marveling at the way the river illuminated the green in his eyes. “I take it your conversation with Cade went well.”
He nodded. “It did. I’m not sure how he would’ve done staying behind if the girls weren’t at the ranch, but I’m not complaining. He’s made huge leaps in the last month.”
“They’ve connected so well.” I gathered up the hem of my dress and draped it over my arm as I stepped out onto a shallow shelf in the river. Jesse held my other hand, helping me keep my balance. I smiled, relishing in the way the water lifted above my ankles.
Jesse gave a soft breath, the sound infused with meaning and weight.
“What?” I asked.
His eyes flicked over the water, scanning upstream. “Any time I’ve been tempted to believe you and I were experiencing a lapse in judgment, I remember how well we all fit. Like we’ve been tailor made—all five of us.”
I rolled my lips together as a surge of emotion brought heat to my eyes. “We do.”
“But all of our children have been hurt by a parent disappearing. We need to be really careful how we go about this—for their sake.”
I squeezed his hand, thankful for his insight. “Nice and slow.”
He parroted me. “Nice and slow.” He suddenly looked to my feet. “How’s it feel?”
“Like bath water. Is this where we are swimming?”
“Yes. And dancing.”
My eyes went wide. “Oh my. That sounds very romantic.”
“Good. Romancing you was kind of the idea.”
Romancing me?My heart tumbled through my ribcage as hot desire raged in my belly. A smile I couldn’t stop split across my face.
“You want to eat then come back?”
