Desperation clawed at me. “What can I do? I’ll do anything for her.”
“Pray if you’re a praying man. We will keep working on things over here and see if we can get her to at least comply with visitation.”
My face heated, and tears formed in my eyes. This couldn’t be happening. Please. Anything but this.
“Can you convince her, Debbie?”
“You do understand I’m between a rock and a hard place here. As her caseworker, it’s my job to pursue what is in her best interest, but also uphold her wishes and protect her rights.” Her voice wavered. “I represent her first. We can still proceed with the court date and hope…”
I couldn’t answer. Couldn’t listen. Her words were mere words. The last important thing on this planet was my daughter.
“…I’ll be in touch if anything changes.”
She hung up. Pain ravaged my heart. I slammed my fist onto the workbench. A yell ripped up from my throat, and I swiped the counter’s contents—some files and a few car parts—onto the ground. Valiant startled. I jerked my hat off and threw it, cursing into the backyard.
I can’t do this. Can’t endure anymore pain.
I walked around the shop and leaned on the siding, forcing several deep breaths. My knees gave, and I slid down into the grass, tilting my head against the wall. Hot tears burned my eyes. I remembered bringing the urn back to my apartment. The desire to numb the pain was so strong. That same feeling coursed through my veins.
Valiant trotted around the shop and laid his head in my lap.
Calm down, Moore. Maybe she’ll come around.
But what if she didn’t? I’d thought the same thing about Jules.
Is it me? Did I scare them away?
I gripped at my chest, the all-too-familiar pain pressing in, deeper than ever before. I took a deep breath. Blinked back the tears. The shop’s automatic air-compressor flipped on, the low hum breaking the silence.
There was only one way I was going to survive this.
I slowly stood, dislodging Val’s head from my lap and went back to the shop.
Danny was in the back room, going over the schedule. I stuck my head in the door and tried to sound steady. “What’s on after the Camry?”
His gruff voice answered as he shuffled a stack of papers. “We gotta replace the rack and pinion on the Ford.”
“Can you pull it in?”
He frowned at me. Glanced at his watch. “It’s almost 7:15 p.m. You startin’ it tonight?”
“Plan to.”
“Alright. You the boss.”
I disappeared back under the Camry. Had the force to get the rotors off this time.
FORTY-NINE
Julia
“Slow down! What’s wrong with you?” Gina puffed behind me on the trail.
We were in the Smokies for the weekend, hiking a trail off the beaten path. I’d needed to get out. Needed to get away from the quiet apartment and from Jack, who’d been breathing down my neck about my drinking the past few weeks. He was good intentioned, but I wanted the man to leave me alone for heaven’s sake.
The crisp mountain air would make me feel better. I pulled my beanie down further over my forehead as the wind whipped around the rock face. I adjusted my backpack on my shoulders and stopped for the hundredth time. “I’m not going that fast,” I called back to her.
She caught up, panting. “Yes, you are. You’re killing me. I can’t even stop and smell the flowers.”
