“And you want me to do it?”
“You’re amazing at it.”
His compliment was sweet. Normally, I’d jump at an opportunity like this, but…
“You can pick anything you want.”
“You’ll have to give me some ideas.”
“It only matters that you like it.” He snapped his fingers. “And Sunny. Only room I don’t want you to decorate is hers. Once we know I’m granted rights, I want her to have a say in how her room looks.”
I huffed. He wantedmeto like it. “It’s your house though, Pat.” He was communicating a lot more than he was realizing.
He’s about to ask me to marry him.
The thought shoved the breath out of my lungs. That’s why he was acting weird. My stomach twisted as I thought of Cameron’s proposal.
He had wanted so many of the things Pat was about to offer me. Lots of land out in the country, garden plots, a house decorated the way I liked, a rock on my finger, and a family.
But as new teachers with mountains of student debt, a promise ring offered at a cheap restaurant had to suffice. We moved into a dingy apartment and lived on the bare minimum. It was enough too. We were happy.
Until I ruined everything.
And here I was, about to step into Cam’s dream with another man. That hot sticky, caught-red-handed feeling washed over me. My face and ears burned, and I couldn’t breathe. I loved Pat, but this was wrong. So very wrong.
I knew what was coming next.
Pat settled next to me on the couch. “I want it to be your house, too, Jules.”
The idea of turning down a proposal gutted me. I did not want to tell him no.
I have to stop this.
“I lie in bed at night and ache for you. I’ve known you what—seven months? You’re my best friend and I want us to—” He kept talking, but I didn’t hear the words. His hands were trembling, and he was reaching into his pocket.
I shot off the couch. Pat’s hand stopped, halfway in. “Whoa. You okay?”
I wasn’t. The room was spinning, and the sticky feeling had bloomed into a full-fledged urge to vomit. The steak and potatoes curdled in my stomach. In a second’s time, he was at my side.
“Hey, I’m sorry. Is it something I said?”
It was everything he said.
“Sit down. Looks like you’re going to faint.”
I jerked my hand back from his. “No.” I felt angry. Why? He didn’t do anything wrong. “I can’t do this with you.”
His face fell. “Wha—what do you mean?”
“I love you, but I can’t be everything you want me to be, Pat.”
He swallowed and frowned. Doing his best to figure out what I meant. WhatdidI mean?
His wife that’s what. I cannot be his wife.
“You want me to come here and play mom with Sunny. Step in where Gracie should’ve been.”
Pat puffed in disbelief. “Have I made you feel that way?”
