He snatched her hand. “How are you?”
She raised a brow.
“About Donaldson. How are you feeling about that?”
“I’m fine.” When she smiled, even she knew it was a brittle smile.
“You’re not.”
“I will be.”
He looked skeptical and she leaned over to kiss his cheek. “I will be thanks to ye. Thank ye, Iain, for everything ye’ve done for me.”
“I’d do anything for you, Cait.”
She smiled and touched his cheek before straightening. “Sleep well.”
It had been an exhausting, emotional day. Coupled with making love to Iain, everything was jumbled inside her. She was angry at herself for letting a man like Donaldson control her.
But wasn’t she also letting her fear of a relationship with Iain control her?
Did she really have any control over any of it?
Chapter 27
Alice had her baby later that morning. A strapping bundle of boy. Iain insisted on escorting Cait to the cottage, and by the time they got there, Alice was ready to push that baby into the world. He came out squalling, with an excellent set of lungs and alert eyes. Really, all Cait was needed for was to catch the wee lad as he slithered into her hands.
Birthing babies was one of her favorite things to do; she loved being the first one to touch a baby and hold it and see it take its first breath. But she was emotionally wrung out afterward, as she always thought of Christina. Her beautiful, sweet Christina, whom she had struggled to bring into the world. It had not been an easy birth, but oh, how worth it she had been, healthy and strong, if tiny. She had flourished and always been such a well-behaved lass.
Cait left Alice, the babe, and the three other children to go in search of Iain. He was sitting under a tree with the new father, Sean, drinking ale and telling tall tales, no doubt. Sean stood immediately and anxiously searched Cait’s face.
“She’s fine, and so is the babe. Go on and see her. Find out what ye’ve got there.” She watched, smiling, as Sean loped off, half pissed with drink. “Ye two were having a fine time drinking out here while Alice did all the laboring.”
“It’s hard work being a man and having to sit outside feeling helpless. The drink helped calm him.”
“Well, then ye did a fine job, because he’s very calm.”
He shrugged and grinned. “I try.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her down next to him. The tree was big enough for both of them to lean against, and Cait rested her head against the rough bark with a deep sigh. They held hands and sat in silence while the birds sang in the tree above them and the warm breeze nearly lulled her to sleep. Neither of them had slept much the night before, and she could easily fall asleep right here.
“You did good in there,” Iain said.
She turned her head to look at him. “Ye weren’t even in there.”
He shrugged. “I didn’t need to be to know you did good. I’ve seen you with your patients. You’re a good healer.”
“Thank ye.” She was inordinately pleased by his praise.
He held up their linked hands. “Sometimes I tend to forget what these hands can do. I’ve seen you dig a pistol ball out of Adair and tend to those who were burned in the fire.” He kissed her fingers. “And just a wee bit ago, you delivered a babe.”
“Really, I just caught him. Alice did all the work.”
He turned his head so they were almost nose to nose. “Don’t discredit what you do. It’s vital, and I want you to know that I would never ask you to stop being a healer. I understand that it’s a large part of who you are.”
She smiled at him. “I’m glad ye understand that about me.”
He lowered their hands to rest on his hard thigh. “I understand more than you think. I understand that birthing babies takes something out of you. I can see it in your eyes right now. You’re thinking about your own wee one.”
She pulled in a surprised breath and turned her head away, discomfited that he’d reached so far down into her soul and seen the dark part of her that was jealous of Alice and her four beautiful, healthy babes when Cait couldn’t even keep the one she’d been given.
