As if he couldn’t help himself, Ethan reached for me, his thumb gentle as it brushed across my cheek. “I’m so fucking sorry that happened to you. Were you hurt?”
I silently nod, my throat working as I tried to explain just how badly. “I—I almost died.” I sucked in a breath to try and calm my frantically beating heart. “He shot me in the back.” My hand moved toward my side, where I’d felt the first piercing pain. “It took months of rehab to get to where I’m at now, and I probably won’t ever be able to play sports again like I used to.”
I’d been on the soccer and track teams at my old college. Fuck. I’d lost so much and pushing it all aside in the hopes that I’d eventually move on wasn’t cutting it any longer.
“Who was it that hurt you?”
I felt his rasp all the way to my center, and this time I couldn't speak for other reasons. Ethan Sullivan was a fucking nice distraction from the worst day of my life, especially when he wore a murderous stare like he wanted a few minutes alone with my shooter.
“They never caught him. By now they assume he’s changed his name and identity. Possibly even left the country…they don’t believe he’s still a threat to me.”
He straightened and the darkness wreathing his features called to me on a primal level. I’d been subconsciously seekingout safebut dangerousmen ever since that attack, and Ethan was no different. “He won’t ever hurt you again, okay? Not while you’re here. That includes the nightmares. It doesn’t matter what time of the day or night you need distraction or to talk, I want you to find me.”
Before I thought through my actions, I was throwing myself into his arms. There was a moment of shocked hesitation before Ethan wrapped me up so tightly, holding all of me together.
I wasn't fixed. Not even close. But Ethan did what he had done best since the first time I ran into him: he eased my pain.
“Don’t run from me,” he whispered against my hair. “I won’t ask for anything you’re not ready to give, and I’ll always be your friend, sweetheart. I’ll be the best friend you’ve ever had. Just stop running. It’s stressful when I don’t know where you are or if you’re safe.”
A sobbed laugh escaped me. “You’ll have to fight Brodie for the best friend title.”
Against my hair, I felt Ethan smile. “I’ll kick that spoiled punk’s ass.”
I loosened my grip on him, intending to step away, but somehow, as I tipped my head back to look up at him, our lips brushed. I froze, holding my breath, but then Ethan released the smallest of groans, and my control shattered.
The last two times we’d kissed had been in the height of a panic attack. They’d served to shock me out of the dark corner of my mind and redirect my focus to something a whole lot more enjoyable. But this time, it was entirely different. My fingers threaded into the back of his short hair, and I pulled him down to me, crushing our lips together and eliminating any question of whether I was still attracted to him.
Fuck the rules. He wasn’tthatmuch older than me anyway. Maybe four or five years? That was my guess, and that hardly constituted it as an “age gap” by romance book standards.
He moaned again as our tongues met, and the sound did incredible things to my insides. Why was thatsucha turn-on?
“Eve…” he groaned between kisses. “Lilith…”
I grinned, loving how he’d coined my sexy, sultry alter-ego name. One of his hands was tangled in my hair and the other gripped my ass so tight, I mentally cursed myself for not wearing a skirt. If not for the pesky jeans, he could just?—
“Yo. Ethan, dude.Sonot okay.” Brodie’s voice cut through our make-out session like nails on a chalkboard. “For one thing, you’re in the middle of an unlocked classroom where literally anyone could walk in. For another,you’re her teacher!Do I need to remind you about abusing your power?”
“Brodie…justfuck off,” Ethan growled, not letting me go. In fact, he dipped back in and kissed my throat while I stared in panic at Brodie. Crap, now my imagination was playing out a fantasy where Brodie came over and joined us…
But no, he just scowled and shook his head, arms folded across his broad chest. “I’ll say it again: literallyanyonecould walk in. Or did you want to get fired and removed from campus for indecent conduct?”
Shit. That was the wake-up call I needed, and I peeled myself out of Ethan’s embrace.
“I should go,” I muttered, not meeting his gaze. “I have a study session this afternoon.”
Ethan gusted out a long sigh. “We can talk later. You’ll be home for dinner, right? I’m cooking chicken parmesan.”
Something about the way he’d asked those questionsstruck a chord in my chest and I nodded. “Yep. See you then.”
It wasn’t until I brushed past Brodie and all butranfrom that class that I realized why I had such intense butterflies.Home. He’d asked if I’d behomefor dinner…like we really were a family.
For the first time since I was six, when mom died, there was a real sense of belonging in this world. Belonging in BluebellHouse, and even though Andrew and Connor kept their distance, the other three were becoming both familiar and important to me.
That was another part of what I’d been running from, these feelings of belonging.
Belonging meant it could be torn away, and I wasn’t sure I’d survive it again.
17
