"I didn't realize we were the type to cuddle after sex, Violence," he told me in a dark whisper. He kept my wrist captive in a lock between us, but his free hand worked its way down the front of my pants. I was still wearing his borrowed clothes with no underwear—because mine had been gross as fuck—so his fingers met bare flesh. "Or are you really just angry because you woke up hot and needy and I wasn't there to get you off?"
Anger welled up in me, but before I could tell him to go fuck himself, he slipped a finger inside me. Dammit. My rage-filled retort just dissolved into a breathy sigh, and my hips surged forward, begging for more.
God damn him. I knew what he was doing. He was reminding me how badly my body craved his and deflecting from his shitty attitude and behavior. With monumental mental effort, I struggled out of his grip and moved away from him.
"Fuck you, Rafe." I snapped. "I don't deserve your bullshit. When you're ready to discuss what's actually got you all twisted up, I'm all ears. Until then, keep your hands, and your dick, to yourself. This shop is shut until further notice."
Good fortune smiled down on me, and I spotted a nurse leaving one of the guest rooms further along the hallway. Considering Felipe was still in the dining hall, I took a gamble that I'd find Jordan in there.
Thankfully, my gamble paid off because Rafe stalked off with a scowl like a thundercloud, and I wasn’t keen on wandering aimlessly around the palace for the next hour.
"Jordy!" I exclaimed, seeing him sitting up in the king-size bed. He was covered in bruises and scabbing wounds, but otherwise he seemed okay. Physically, anyway. There was a shadowed darkness in his eyes that made my heart squeeze painfully.
His lips curved in a plastic smile when he saw me, and he indicated for me to come closer. "Violet, I’d wondered if maybe you’d forgotten about me."
Sourness turned my stomach. "What? No, I would never. Why would you think that?"
He gave a slight, one-shouldered shrug. "I dunno. Rafe was here for ages this morning, and all he said was that you were busy. I sorta figured maybe you had better things to do."
Wow.
"Um, what the fuck?" I scowled, sitting carefully on the edge of his bed. "Rafe specifically told menotto come and see you this morning. In fact, he was being a total douche-wad about it too. I would have come sooner, but we had to discuss everything that happened with Felipe and Jacinta, and... Jordan, did you know Mr. Wainwright was really high up in the Society?"
I was babbling a bit, but I didn't care. Jordan had never been the sort of guy who'd make me feel uncomfortable. He always made me feel safe and secure. Cherished.
But the silence stretched between us, and my mood quickly dropped. How stupid of me to think just because we were free of Uriel, the effects of his torture would be gone. They clearly weren't, if the tension in Jordan's jaw was anything to judge on.
"Are you okay?" I asked softly when he said nothing back. I reached out to take his hand in mine, but he jerked away before our fingers touched.
Ouch.
"I'm fine," he lied. "The medics have said I should be good as new in a few days. No lasting damage." His voice was tight, and it sent waves of concern and desperation washing through me.
I bit my lip, thinking. I had never been a great one for talking about my own feelings, and my bonding moment with Jax over breakfast had pretty much drained me of all capacity for emotional discussions. But something was clearly wrong. I couldn't just take Jordan at his word... not when I cared so deeply about his well-being.
“I’m sorry to hear about Meghan,” I told him in a quiet voice. “I know you weren’t in love with her or anything, but—”
“I don’t want to talk about her,” Jordan snapped, cutting me off. His jaw tightened, and his gaze shifted to the window. His whole being radiated tension, and I was at a loss for how to fix it. But I needed to try.
"Jax suggested we go for a swim in the springs," I offered with a hopeful inflection in my voice. "The minerals in the water are supposed to help speed the healing process up."
He gave a bitter snort. "You believe that?"
I bit the inside of my cheek, letting the pain ground me. "I believe it can't do any harm. And I believe that you're really mad at me for everything that happened to us, but I don't want to just walk away from all of this. So I don't know." I shrugged, feeling hope slipping through my fingers. "Maybe I just want an excuse to be alone with you for a few minutes."
The nurse across the room, who'd been silently packing up her equipment, froze and gave us an awkward smile. "If my opinion is of any use," she whispered, "I think it's a great idea to take a swim. Those minerals are unlike anything else on Earth." She shot me a subtle wink before turning away from us.
Jordan's jaw was still tight as a bowstring, but he jerked a sharp nod. "Fine. I'll meet you out there."
I grabbed onto that flimsy thread of hope and ran with it. Nodding quickly, I had an awkward little hesitation as I instinctively leaned forward to kiss him, then remembered things were all kinds of crazy between us and stopped again.
"I'll, uh," I stammered, standing up and running a nervous hand through my hair, "I'll get changed then."
I hurried back out of Jordan's room and spent the quick walk back to Rafe's room mentally berating my weird awkwardness. I'd never been such a nervous wreck around a guy before, and things with Jordan had all been sonaturalwhen we’d started seeing each other. This was all new territory for me, and I felt like I was messing it up monumentally.
Thankfully, Jax had made good on her promise to have clothing sent up to Rafe's room for me. There was a garment rack just inside the door with way more outfits hanging from it than I needed. Outfits foralldifferent occasions, including an evening gown. Luckily, though, that meant there were also four different swimsuits to choose from.
I changed quickly into a red bikini, then grabbed a towel from Rafe's bathroom. I was in a hurry to get to the springs, not wanting to lose even a moment of time alone with Jordan. Maybe I could somehow get him to open up to me. He'd been tortured horribly, that was for sure. And he had every right to blame me.
