With those parting words, I snapped the cuff that I had just loosened over Pica’s wrist and then the other over my own, snatching the dagger out of her shocked grip with my other hand.
“Activate,” I muttered.
The screams were unearthly, as though I had just torn Pica into a million pieces and was dragging her behind me as I passed unharmed through the darkness. I remembered the feeling of Rau’s curse ripping into me and how it had torn my soul apart, and it seemed suddenly fitting that I had eventually done the same to him, though I hadn’t realised exactly what I had been doing at the time. I felt guilty for Pica’s screams, though. As crazy as she was, all of her insanity seemed to stem from the same point of reference: the loss of her child. At the very least, I could understand how something inside of her had snapped, and it hurt to have to fight against her, knowing where her pain stemmed from.
When I slammed into hard ground again, I could hear her beside me, curled up in the dry, colourless dirt, sobbing. I pulled the cuff from her wrist and stood, looking around. Several of the god-children were watching, though they did it from afar—their eyes peeking out at us from behind scraggly vegetation.
“I’m sorry I hurt you,” I told Pica. “And I’m sorry I lied to you about Rau. I don’t intend to bring him back to life. I don’t intend to bring you back, either. But I think … I think you might find a reason to stay here after all.”
She didn’t even seem to be listening to me; she remained hunched over, crying. The guilt inside me increased—until I saw the dagger I had dropped in the dirt. Pica had tried to kill me, andwouldhave killed me, just so she could play happy families with mycorpse. I didn’t have the luxury of feeling sorry for her.
“Pica,” I said, louder this time. My voice stronger. “Look past the pain and see where you are. Understand what this means. You can finally have your daughter back.”
She stopped crying, lifting herself from the dirt. I quickly grabbed the knife before she could use it on me, remembering that it was possible to finally kill a god within this realm—once and for all.
“She is here,” I told Pica. “This is where Staviti sent her after taking her from you. She ishere, somewhere, Pica. You just have to find her.”
“H-how will I find her?” Pica asked, her tears vanishing as though they had never existed in the first place. She took several steps toward me but I backed away, holding the knife out in front of me.
“Try calling for her?” I suggested, still backing away. “Did she have a name?”
“Willy…,” Pica muttered, her face creasing up in pain, her eyes closing. “Willy … Jill … my baby’s name was Jillian, but I called her Jilly.”
Pain constricted in my chest, but I didn’t lower the knife. I had to keep reminding myself that this woman had deceived me and tried to kill me.
“Go,” I ordered. “Go and find her, Pica.”
She began to walk away, but paused after a few steps, levelling me with a single lucid look.
“I should not be thanking you … but I feel free, now,” she admitted before turning her back on me and walking away.
I waited until I could no longer see her before I glanced down at the items in my hands. The chain and the dagger. Two pathways back to Topia, for the weight of two souls.
“You see everything that happens in Topia.” I spoke into the silence. “You know I’m here. You can come out now.”
A dry chuckle met my statement, and a robed man suddenly appeared, his grey, almost lifeless form separating from the equally grey and lifeless trunk of a tree several feet away.
“Willa Knight,” Jakan greeted, walking toward me. “You have surprised me yet again.”
“Doing what’s expected of me was never my strong suit,” I admitted, casting my eyes over him as though there were something important to catch in his appearance.
A hint ofme, perhaps.
“I came here for you,” I admitted.
He stared at the instruments in my hands. “I found a way out of here once, but I had a lot more power then. My brother caught me, weakened me, and sent me back, and I have remained weak. This land is only linked to Topia through a single, very narrow point, and I have spent many life-cycles here, my power slowly draining away. I had thought that I would eventually become mortal and die here, as mortals do in Minatsol. I never thought that I would go back again.”
“How did my mother get here?” I asked.
“When Staviti sent me back, I had a soul-bond with your mother. The piece of her that was connected to me was torn from her soul and transported here with me. I am sorry for that, Willa. I did my best to protect her, to protect you both … I’m sorry I failed.”
“You’re my father.” It was a statement.
He nodded. “Yes, I am your father. I have watched you through your mother’s eyes for many life-cycles. I have been with you always, Willa.”
My father had been a nothing concept to me for my entire life. He didn’t exist. My mother never told me any stories of him, or described his looks, or even spoke of a name. It was almost as if I had been brought to life from her alone.
I hadn’t wanted or missed a father.
