“Are you okay, baby? It’s understandable if you’re upset.”
“I really don’t know how to feel,” I began, then out of nowhere, a wave of emotion hit me as flashes of the good times that Shane and I shared ran through my mind. Feeling a lump in my throat, I tried my best to not cry. But as the tears started to flow, I couldn’t get them to stop.
“Oh, baby, don’t cry,” Kevin consoled me as he reached over and held my hand. “Everything is going to be okay.”
“It’s just crazy. The last time Shane reached out to me was a couple of days ago. He called and texted me, but I ignored him as I had been doing. He had hurt me so bad that I didn’t want to talk to him or hear him apologize. I was so damn angry with him!” I continued to cry. “I knew in my heart that I was done with him and that we could never be friends ever again. Now to hear that he was killed makes me feel some type of way. Like, I can’t even imagine.”
“I can’t imagine either, but Shane was playing a very dangerous game with the livelihood of God knows how many people. I’m not saying he deserved what happened, but at the same time, I’m not surprised by it either. If he was walking around passing out the virus to different people, it was only a matter of time before someone snapped out on his ass.”
Listening to Kevin, I knew he had a point. Especially with his neighbor telling his family that the person that did it had been seen at Shane’s house several times before. Made me think that it was probably one of the guys he was fucking around with that probably tested positive. Shane used to tell me how the majority of the men he slept with were on the DL, so I could only imagine.
“You don’t think Justin had something to do with it, do you? I mean, his cousin said that his neighbor saw the person leave after the attack and get in a car and pull off and it was someone that they’d seen several times over there. I didn’t ask for specifics because I was basically tongue-tied when I was talking to Pedro, but what if it was Justin?”
“I highly doubt that. I know first-hand your ex is a pussy. Justin can’t fight for shit.”
“Well dang, Kev!” I chuckled. “That wasn’t very nice to say.”
“It’s the truth though. Ain’t no tellin’ who it was to be honest. I just don’t think Justin has the heart to beat someone to death.”
“I don’t know. I just hope that isn’t the case.”
“Don’t start worrying yourself about some shit you can’t control, Ava. You have enough stuff on your plate to work through. You don’t need to be worrying about what happened to the dude that phony kicked it with you and was fucking on your ex. I don’t mean to sound so negative, but I don’t have any sympathy for Shane. In my opinion, he wasn’t a real friend to you. He was one of the people that hurt you so bad that you question if you’re enough. In my opinion, fuck them both. My concern is you and only you.”
I didn’t respond to what Kevin said because he was right. I shouldn’t have been concerned about what Justin or Shane had going on because all of that was now in my past. He was right that Shane wasn’t a true friend, but I couldn’t help the emotions that I was feeling.
“You’re right. I feel foolish sitting here crying over my ex’s lover. It’s just that… never mind. After all, he did almost kill me with that damn virus.”
“Exactly! Fuck him! You have a heart of gold, beautiful, that can be both a bad and good thing,” Kevin said as he turned down the block that I lived on. “It’s a good thing because it makes you a genuine, honest person, but it’s a bad thing because you end up getting your heart broken loaning it to people who don’t deserve it. Neither one of them fools deserved to have you in their life as far as I’m concerned.”
“You’re right. Thank you for that. Today has been exhausting,” I said as Kevin pulled into my driveway. Taking off my seatbelt, I got out of the truck then headed inside.
“Today has been one for the books for sure. Your divorce was finalized, I had to knock some sense in your ex’s head, and now the news about Shane. I know that’s a lot happening all at once, but I have your back, baby. I’m here for you to talk if you want.”
“Thanks, Kevin,” I said, locking the front door. Turning around to face him, I gave him a tight, long hug. “Were you able to find the kit?”
“I sure did,” he responded, handing me the Walgreens bag he had in his hand.
Taking the box out of the bag, and two packs of Hostess cupcakes he bought, I placed everything on the family room table. I picked up the kit and started to read the instructions. I never knew that Walgreens carried HIV home testing kits and was interested in how it worked.
“I love those cupcakes. I bought us each a pack in case you get a sweet tooth later.”
“Thanks, those and Suzy Q’s are my favorites.”
“I agree!” Kevin smiled then he poured some more wine into our glasses.
“Do you think this kit is accurate?” I asked reading the box over.
“I don’t see why it wouldn’t be. I would imagine that it’s just as accurate as a home pregnancy kit.”
“That’s true, I guess. I never thought about it like that.”
“If it would make you feel better, I’ll still go get a test done at my doctor’s office as backup,” Kevin suggested.
“That’s up to you. In the meantime, let’s crack this box open and see how this thing works.”
Kevin and I sat in the family room reading over the instructions together. The way the kit worked was pretty simple. All he had to do was prick his finger with the small needle that was provided in the kit, let a drop of his blood land on the tester then wait for the results. According to the instructions, it onlytook twenty minutes, and the reading was digital. Once it was ready it would either say, Negative or Positive across the screen. Kevin went through all the steps then we sat together and waited to see what his results would be.
DAWN
