“Why on earth would that happen if your results came back negative?”
“Welp, it can be too early to detect… who knows?” I explained.
“I think you gon’ be just fine. Just try to think positive and don’t put that into the universe. All that hanging out Justin was doing just may end up being a blessing for you ‘cause had he been up under you, or you up under him who knows what could have happened. You may not have been so lucky being that the two of you stayed fucking on each other.”
“How so? Justin and I were still very sexually active, even though he was always kicking it somewhere else. Not until I found the condom in his pocket did sex between us slow down.”
“Right! So, he must have contracted the virus during that time which would be your blessing. That also means there is a higher chance you won’t test positive down the line. Well, let’s hope that’s the case. I think that you’ll be straight. I’m just glad that you left when you did.”
“That’s true, but it’s different when you’re going through it than to be on the sidelines, D. You don’t have to live with this hanging over your head, I do. It’s something that I constantly think about. It sucks because the whole time Justin was being selfish only thinking about himself. He put not just his life at risk but mine and Tate’s too. That’s something that you can’t get over just like that, you know? That was some very scary shit to go through, especially being that Justin and I are married. I trusted him.”
“In this day and age, that’s some shit that should be hanging over any sexually active person’s head. Any time you lay it low and spread it wide for a man you subject yourself to STD’s and HIV. What blows my mind is that Shane was out in these streets getting it on with a bunch of randoms without protecting himself. Like, who the fuck does that shit!”
“That’s so true. I never thought about it like that until now. What Shane had going on I never thought that it would affect me in any way. As for Justin, I just suspected that it was another woman he was cheating on me with. I never suspected that Justin was on the DL, and I never thought that I needed to worry about being exposed to a terminal illness. I used to get sick to my stomach just thinking about him being intimate with some female. I was afraid that he would catch feelings for her and leave me. That’s what I was most concerned about, but boy wasI off. To say that I have learned a lesson from all of this would be an understatement.”
“The Lord is on your side obviously. Watch, you’ll always have a negative result, sis. That is just too damn much going on for me!” Dawn sighed then continued. “See, that’s the reason why I’m single now. I ain’t got time for the bullshit! Murder would be the case that they’d give me, no lie.”
“Don’t start.”
“I’m very serious. The first sign that shit is off with a dude I’m out. I ain’t got the time at all. I sure hope you learned a valuable lesson from all of this though, because sometimes you can be a little too forgiving when you need to follow your heart more. A woman’s intuition is ALWAYS right, my love.”
“You are right about that! I remember Mom always used to say that. I’m not as hardcore with it like you are, but I definitely learned a lesson for sure.”
“Good, ‘cause chile you had me out in these streets fighting and carrying on. That was just too much!” Dawn complained then started laughing.
“Oh, wow! Says the one that stays ready to throw down all the time. That was all you!” I rebutted chuckling.
“I wouldn’t have had to act up if it wasn’t for your crazy ass ex and friend.”
“Not all men are down low liars like Justin or backstabbing assess like Shane.”
“Shit, that’s a lie. Not all men are on the down low… but they all are liars!” Dawn corrected.
“That’s not fair to say.”
“It may not be fair, but it’s damn sure true!”
“See, that’s why you’re not open to dating. You walk into every situation like the other is always lying. You gotta chill a little bit and let people show you who they really are before you judge them off the cuff like that.”
“You think so, huh? We both see how that worked out for you, right?” Dawn countered and all I could do was roll my eyes. “I’m not trying to be mean, but you’ll see. All men will lie off the cuff about anything from the smallest shit to the most important stuff. I don’t get it, but that’s just how it is.”
“That’s definitely true with Justin. All the signs were there even before he and I got married. But I had on a pair of rose-colored glasses and didn’t see them.”
“More like a pair of blinders on,” Dawn corrected causing me to roll my eyes again, but we ended up laughing because it was true and funny at the same time.
“I will say that I am still open to love since I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. That’s something I can’t help. But,” I emphasized then continued, “I’ll no longer ignore the signs when things are off. I know to some degree you gotta be lonely or yearn to be in love, D.”
“Nah, that’s your story, not mine. I’m cool with being single.”
“If you say so. I saw how you and Troy been looking at each other. It’s clear y’all like what y’all see. Do you want me to talk to Kevin and have him hook you up with his cousin? You never know, y’all might really hit it off.”
“You better not! I don’t need you playing matchmaker for me! Lawd, no thank you!” Dawn made it clear, and I knew what she was insinuating but I let her have that shade. “I won’t lie though. Troy is one sexy motherfucker.”
“He damn sure is. You betta snatch that up while he showing signs that he’s interested,” I suggested.
“If dude is interested in me, he can try to holla at me. I don’t want you sayin’ nothin’ to Kevin about it. You gon’ have me out here lookin’ desperate, and that’s something that I’ll never be over a man. I don’t care how sexy his ass is.”
“I swear you stay thinking negative all the time. You have absolutely no chill whatsoever!”
