Even if he couldn’t imagine letting her go again.
It didn’t matter. They were too different, and she was not meant for him, no matter how much he wanted her.
The duchess clapped her hands excitedly as the dance came to a close.
“Ella, you were marvelous!” she said, bustling over to clasp her stepdaughter’s hands.
“You were lovely, too, Dietrich,” Dietrich said dryly under his breath.
“Oh, yes, you were,” the duchess exclaimed, turning to him.
Dietrich blushed and waved her off. He hadn’t meant for her to hear him.
“He’s only messing with you,” Ella explained to her mother.
“The two of you danced beautifully together,” the duchess said, exchanging a knowing glance with her husband.
Dietrich wanted to bang his head into the wall. Did they also think that Ella should be with him? Was that why the duke had called him in here?
Why did none of the adults understand that they could not be together?
He laughed at himself. He was an adult, too, even if he didn’t feel that way most of the time. He still felt like the young teen stepping up to take his father’s place after he’d been lost, or the young boy watching a little girl play unaccompanied in the courtyard where she’d never been alone before.
“Thank you, I must go prepare the stables for the ball,” he said, hurrying out of the room.
None of them said anything to stop him. He wasn’t sure he would have listened if they had.
He made his way through the courtyard, pausing to stare at the spot where he’d last seen tiny Eliana. She’d had his pumpkin, hiding it in a patch of dirt, then digging it up again.
He’d almost gone to play with her, but his father had called him, and he’d gone to the stables instead.
Then she’d been gone.
And now she was back, and memories of her continued to plague him.
This had gone on for too long. Maybe if he couldn’t escape her, he would need to see if one of the other estates was looking for a stable master.
As much as he would hate to leave the duke, he couldn’t spend this much time in close proximity to her without losing his mind. They needed to leave each other alone, and if everyone was conspiring to push them together, he would not be able to do it.
“What’s got you in a twist?” John asked, coming around the corner as Dietrich stopped in front of Turnip’s stall and began petting him.
“Nothing. I’m fine,” Dietrich said.
John laughed. “You sure look fine.”
Dietrich glared at him. “I’m just saying,” John said, raising his hands in a show of innocence. “If I was all upset like that, you’d call me out on it.”
“It’s my job to call you out on it,” Dietrich pointed out.
“Well, consider it my job to call you out now,” John said. “Your mother isn’t here, so I’m filling in.”
“You’re not my mother.” Not that he sounded like an adult right now, either.
“But you don’t have her here, so until then, I’ll have to do. And I think you need to hear some advice from someone a little older than you. I have children, you know. I’m not entirely incompetent at giving advice.”
“I didn’t say you were,” Dietrich said.
“I think that, perhaps,” John said, “you need a little advice, but I want you to actually listen to it this time.”
