“Your mother is Princess Ygraine?The one who abdicated and went on walkabout to this world a long-ass time ago?”
“About forty years ago, if we want to put a time on it,” I said, nodding.
“Yeah, you’re gonna need to get over there.And pretty quick, too.”He turned his attention to his plate and shoveled in food for a couple long moments before I cleared my throat.He looked up at me.“What?”
“You don’t seem in much of a hurry to help out here, cousin,” I said.
He gave me a smartass grin.“I didn’t sayIneeded to get one there quick.I said you did.I ain’t the one in a hurry.”
I stood up, hearing my chair topple over and skid across the floor behind me.“You’re gonna be the one in a hospital if you don’t quit shoving chicken in your face and get me…” I remembered we were in a public place, and most people don’t believe in fairies.“What I need.”
Then I turned around, picked up my chair, and sat down, trying not to look like a giant tattooed thug threatening a rival meth dealer in the middle of a crowded restaurant.I saw the woman behind the counter pick up the telephone, but James held up his hand.
“It’s okay, Mai.He’s family,” the big man said.
“You tell your family not to break my restaurant,” the woman called across the room.
“Bubba, don’t break Mai’s restaurant,” James repeated.
“I promise not to break the building,” I said.I didn’t say anything about any of the furnishings or occupants, but figured Mai didn’t know me well enough to see the loophole I’d left myself.
“And don’t try to break me, either,” James said.“You might be able to do it, but it would be bad for the décor, and bad for my relationship with Mai.And probably bad for your health, too.”
I leaned forward.“I’m running out of patience pretty quick here, cuz.What do I need to say to convince you this is important?”I was trying not to get in a fight in the restaurant, but this dude was trying my patience.
“I get it,” he said.“It’s important.But if, and it’s a big if, I’m going to open a portal, even just to get a message through, that’s going to take a lot of energy, and I’m going to need to fuel up to do it.Now I’ve just spent four hours hunched over tattooing, which ain’t exactly physically taxing, but does take a lot out of you mentally.So I’m going to refuel for a few more minutes, then we can go back to my shop and see what Grammy says.But Harker?”He turned to look at the wizard.
“Yeah?”
“You need to not be anywhere nearby when we talk to her.If she or Oberon get even a hint that you’re involved in this, they will shut this shit down so fast it’ll make your head spin.”
Harker looked annoyed but nodded.“Fine.I knew I wasn’t going to be able to go with you, Bubba.But I thought I could at least see you off.Guess not.”He stood up, and to my surprise, James motioned at Barry.
“You too, furball,” he said.When the Sasquatch glared at him, James said, “There are no Sasquatch in Faerie.You aren’t a native species, so if you cross over, everything within a hundred miles will know in minutes and come to investigate.Most of those things will be harmless, but not all of them.And even if you all survive their curiosity, it’ll slow you down.A lot.You’ll basically spend every day fighting off fae creatures, and that’s not going to help you rescue your people.”
“What about the humans?”I asked.“Won’t they set off some kind of alarm?”
“Not really,” James replied.“There are enough humans who pass back and forth between Faerie that it’s not all that uncommon.It’ll stir up some interest when three come through at once, but they’ll sense your presence, too, Bubba, so they won’t come rushing in.Most things that can sense a different aura in Faerie will just assume you’re another emissary from one of the queens coming back from kidnapping some human babies.”
“That’s a real thing?”Geri asked.
“Oh, yeah,” the big man replied around a mouthful of noodles.“Mostly we take kids from shitty environments and bring them to Faerie to give them a better life, but sometimes a queen will send a raiding party out to swipe the child of someone who pisses her off and ransom the kid back.That doesn’t happen as much anymore, but it’s not unheard of.”
“Nice,” Ash said.
“That’s not a word anyone ever uses in reference to a Queen of Faerie,” James said, all humor gone from his voice.“You’d all do well to remember this.No one there is your friend, even if they’re related to you, Bubba.Hell,especiallyif they’re related to you.Half of them are going to hate you just for having human blood in your veins, and the other half is going to hate you because even with that human blood your claim on Mab’s throne is stronger than theirs.So all of you need to stay alert, and don’t trust anybody that doesn’t cross over with you.Got it?”
“Got it,” Ash said.
“Okay,” the big inkslinger said, pushing back from the table.“Then let’s go back to my shop and see if Grammy will let y’all come visit.Harker, you’re picking up the tab.”
“Of course,” the skinny wizard said.Everyone headed for the door, but Harker grabbed my elbow.“Look, I’m sorry I can’t go with you.I know you were kinda counting on having my firepower over there, but it sounds an awful lot like I’d be more of a liability than a help.”
“It’s fine,” I said, running my fingers through the mess of my hair.It was still growing out enough to pull it back, so I’d had some unfortunate experiments with hair gel trying to tame my mop for the wedding, and now I just kinda looked like a giant homeless person.“It’s just gonna be a whole new team this time around.I know Geri’s got my back, but Jarvis is…”
“A moron,” Harker finished my sentence for me.
“And Ash is basically a civilian,” I said, glossing over his too-accurate assessment of the man who was supposed to be my brother-in-law by now.
