“Hell, he cries every night. Look sweetcakes, I’ll call Lance to come and babysit, and we can go out. It’s your birthday. I want to take my girl out and buy her dinner for her special day.” Damon moved behind her, wrapped his arms around her stomach, and kissed her neck until her legs turned to rubber. Then he ramped up the sweet talk, coaxing her… not willing to accept a no.
Mixed emotions of wanting to please him yet stay with Nico rose, making her waver rather than saying a firm no. Of course, she’d have loved to get dolled up and go with Damon. She missed those nights when he’d take her to a restaurant and shower compliments on her then haul her onto the dance floor where he’d hold her so close that their bodies felt glued together.
That’s when sexual desire would enflame them both. In fact, there were times they wouldn’t make it out of the parking lotbefore Damon had her dress hiked up in the back seat of his truck while he took his pleasure.
Deep into the fantasy, her body so inflamed she wasn’t safe driving, she had to pull over to the side of the road and allow her mind to go back to one night in particular. One of the last times they had been together.
They’d gone to the roadhouse, a favorite place of Damon’s where smoke filled the joint, beer stunk up the place, and a live band filled the air with thumping, foot-stomping music. A place where everyone knew Damon. Most called out respectfully, even teasingly, and that always made his swagger more extreme. He got off on being noticed.
That night, they’d drunk more than usual, or he had. She always limited herself to a few beers so she could drive home. One difference that plagued her, they had a stranger babysit the kids, one she wasn’t too sure if she trusted but Damon had insisted on hiring so they could have the night out.
Then he’d plied her with outrageous compliments, whispering things in her ear to get her hot, things he knew she loved to hear. About how much he needed her. How pretty she was. His flirty smiles and teasing kisses got to her, like he knew they would.
Hiking up her dress almost indecently, his hand found the soft skin on her leg, and he took advantage of the concealed booth to manipulate her sweet spot under the table. Trying to stop him became impossible. Besides, did she want to? It felt great. He was her husband. It had been a long time since he’d shown her this kind of attention.
Having already seduced her with his searing stares and wandering fingers, the outlandish compliments worked to make her compliant and willing to be his slave. By the time he’d convinced her to dance with him, she’d been as weak as a kitten, wanting to please her master.
His whispers had lavished her with loving comments, while his body mastered hers until she’d clung to him in desperation. Both their needs were off the charts. Unable to stand another minute of the foreplay, he’d rushed her outside where he picked her up in his arms and hurried them to his truck’s back seat, pushed her inside, and followed.
Within seconds, he’d pulled off her panties, opened himself and gotten on top, pleasuring them both until their panting groans finally ceased once he’d growled out his orgasm. Did she experience the same pleasure? Not really. It had happened too fast… too hard. He’d pushed and plunged his way inside her soaking body without any thought to her satisfaction. Yet it had happened the same way many times before in the early days, and she’d always flown along with him.
Funny thing, this time after he stepped away, all Rachel felt was violated.
***
Returning to the present, closing her drenched eyes, she put her forehead on the steering wheel she hugged. Facing the one issue she’d always shied away from, she let the reflections loose. The emptiness of his love-making might have started slowly, but nonetheless, it became an insidious poison affecting their relationship.
Damon, being all about himself, hadn’t noticed her quietness that night or any time since. Taking for granted that if he reached orgasm, then she would certainly have too, he’d acted like an award-winning lover who’d performed as a hero to be idolized.
And she’d never told him differently. That for more than a few years, he hadn’t actually satisfied her – not one time – and she’d kept it all inside. Each and every occasion they’d been intimate,she’d pretend to be gratified. Then afterward, she’d swallow her frustrations and accept the blame for not being able to respond. Flimsy excuses that even she stopped believing.
When she told him she’d been up for two nights with Nico, that she was tired, he’d coaxed her out of it and yielding had been easier than arguing. Or how about the days the kids had both suffered colds and the flu and their constant demands had exhausted her. Yet he’d have his way because she hated when he sulked. Or even the time her stomach hurt to where she couldn’t keep food down. He’d told her to stop being a baby and simply pushed her over and assaulted her body, but it turned out she’d had a throat infection which took two weeks of penicillin to cure.
No matter how many times she’d tried making their sexual experiences sweet and gentle, easy and slow, he’d ignore her needs by taking his own satisfaction and leaving her empty.
She straightened and wiped her tears, looking around at the other people driving by. Starting the car, she drove on and parked near the piles of rubble, noticing that the hive of activity had shrunk. Glancing from one person to the next, it hit her like a brick to the side of her head. No one cared about her or her family. They all had their own lives to live and didn’t have time to worry about Rachel Marks and her newly orphaned children.
Unexpectedly, one face loomed in front of her and wouldn’t be ignored.
Lance cared.
***
Damon had felt low before but after infiltrating Rach’s memories just now, he squirmed on the ground like a worm trying to find a hole to crawl into. The night he’d taken her out for her birthday had always stayed in his mind as one of the better times they’d had together in recent years. Though it had started off strangebecause it had been his brother who’d reminded him of the specialness of the day, he’d gone along with it.
Unaware of the strangeness of Lance’s actions, he’d accepted the bouquet of flowers he’d bought for him to give to Rachel. Lance always remembered special days and saved him more than once from being the jerk who forgot. And it had been Lance’s offer to babysit that drove Damon to insist they go out.
At the time, he’d needed some urging, but once the idea took hold, he’d become excited. Maybe they did need a night out together. His latest party girl had taken off with a band from the big city, leaving him with no one to scratch his constant itch. Why not his wife? At the beginning, she’d been good for him, her tight body and shy ways had turned him on. No reason, with a bit of encouragement, they couldn’t have a good time again.
And so he’d followed through and after having such wild sex in the back seat of his truck, he clearly saw how he’d reacted. How his chest had swelled with satisfaction for having given his woman a good time.
Except he hadn’t. After seeing the reels of her memories, he understood clearly, all their so-called lovemaking hadn’t been that at all. Sex, pure and simple, described it better… at least for him and now it turns out, she’d felt the same. An itch that needed scratching.
The truth was hard to face. Learning he hadn’t been the great lover he’d always believed himself to be, hurt. But deep inside he’d known it all along, hadn’t he?
Lily, his truth teller, had made him see that clearly.
When she’d entered his life, things had changed.
