I trapped her face in my hands. “You listen here. I’d rather spend fifteen minutes holding your hand than all night with either one of them.”
Her brows knit together in mock seriousness. “But not more than a night withbothof them at the same time.”
I scoffed. “Anna, you’re sexier in a pair of sweats than they would be buck naked. Don’t you know that?” But her dubious expression screamed that she didn’t. My hands slipped under her jaw, forcing her eyes up. “I’m sick that I didn’t wait for you. I’m going to regret it until the day I die. I hated who I was then. I hate the choices I made. But Ilovewho I am with you. And I wouldn’t trade what we have for sex with anyone else. I hope you know that.” Her cheeks were a gorgeous dusty pink but I wanted to see if I could make them to go a little deeper. “I mean, if you offered, I’d have you in the bedroom so fast you’d need a neck brace. But I want you to be ready. I want it to be amazing, just like our first kiss was. All our kisses. And if that means our wedding night then that’s okay with me. More than okay. I’m just so freaking thankful there’s going to be a wedding night.” Eventually. It was the time frame that I was struggling with.
Her eyes were hooded and soft. “I don’t want you to carry that weight until the day you die.” She crossed her hands and pushed them out the same way an ump declares someone safe. “Clean start, beginning now.”
I huffed out a laugh. “Who are you? Are you even real?”
She smiled but it was tinged with confusion. “What do you mean?”
“Most girls want to punish a guy for much lesser things.”
Her hands curled around my forearms. “Well, they’d be silly then. We were apart for four years and I missed you every second of them. All I wanted was to be with you and now you’re here. Why would I spend one more minute living in the past?”
“Good grief.” I kissed her forehead, overwhelmed with awe. Always in awe.
She looked at the ground, chewing her lips into a twist. “The coaches’ wives said we should just go ahead and get married,” she said, like the idea was ridiculous.
“I’d be okay with that.” I put my mouth next to her ear. “Since we’re waiting, I say we do it sooner rather than later. Like next weekend. Or if you need a little more time to pull together a wedding, how about over Christmas break?”
She slapped me on the chest. “I’m not ready for that. My age still has the word teen in it.”
“Fine. We’ll get married in July. On your birthday. I might make it that long without combusting every time you touch me. Possibly.”
“Blue.” She cocked her head. “Be serious. After vet school.”
“Oh, I am one hundred percent serious. I am seriously going to explode if I have to wait four and a half more years to make love to you. Just spread my ashes in the ocean. That’s all that’ll be left.”
She giggled, which then morphed into more crying.
“Hey.” I smashed her tight. “I’m just kidding. Sort of. Not really. But I do want you to be happy.”
“I know. I just feel like I’m always giving something up. First, I had to give up my mom. Then I had to give you up in high school. And now if I want to go with you in the spring, I have to give up vet school. I feel like no matter what I do, I’m selling half of my soul for the other half.
My gut clenched. How were we going to make this work? The coaches’ wives weren’t wrong. Every fear Anna had just voiced was fully probable.
I leaned my cheek against hers. “No. You’re not giving up vet school. I don’t want you to give up another single thing. There has to be a way we can make it all work.”
But she offered no solutions and I had none to offer either. So we just stood there, clinging to each other, uncertain and terrified, the setting sun as our backdrop. If we were meant to be, something would work out. Wouldn’t it?
“We’ll figure it out,” she said in an unconvincing hush.
“Yeah. We will.” I forced myself to sound confident. “Together. Always together.”
CHAPTER 24
anna
Shane
Blue was late getting back to Knoxville today because he was visiting you. Now he has to sit out the first half of the game on Saturday. If they lose, that’s on you.
He can’t afford any distractions right now, Anna.
CHAPTER 25
anna
