What else could I do?
I flipped off the light and crawled in next to my niece. It took a second to get situated. A twin bed is not made for three people. It quickly became apparent that the only way Clem and I were not going to fall out was if we reached across Anna and held on to each other—like some kind of balancing act.
I closed my eyes. Every nerve in my body was firing simply from Clem’s fingers wrapped around my tricep and my hand pressed against the small of her back.
Yeah. It was perfectly clear.
At some point, somewhere down the line, I’d done something to make God really, really mad.
I probably lay there wide awake for close to two hours. Every time I moved, Anna sensed it. The moon was right above the house, its light falling through the sheer pink curtains and into my right eyeball. Combine that with my racing thoughtsabout the fact that I was sleeping in the same bed as Clem and, yeah…I was miserable.
Clem’s finger traced the back of my arm, but in a twitchy way that told me she wasn’t awake. Or was she? The thought that she might have done it on purpose caused an eruption in my gut. I was not getting any rest tonight. Not in this room, anyway. I had to go. I made a promise to another woman two thousand miles away, and I was going to keep it. And I couldn’t do that if I was lying in a bed with Clem, even if Anna was between us. If someone sent a snapshot of my current situation to Christy, the why wouldn’t matter. She would punch me in the face. Or worse. And I wouldn’t blame her.
Anna let out a little snore, and I thought I might finally be able to get away. I carefully pulled my arm out from under Clem’s hand. Hopefully Clem wouldn’t fall out of the bed, but I couldn’t care about that anymore. I couldn’t be her protector tonight.
I slid slowly off the mattress. Anna rolled onto her stomach, taking up the space I’d been in. Clem seemed to sense there was room and rolled toward Anna, away from the edge. In my teenage years, I would’ve stood there and watched Clem sleep for a minute, creepy or not. I’d done it a couple of times when she and Sophie had a sleepover in the living room. Lying there, her eyes closed, her freckles begging to be touched, her long red hair splayed across her pillow—it was too beguiling. But twenty-eight-year-old, engaged Silas didn’t have the luxury of giving in to temptation. I’d drawn a line, and I had to stay far, far above it.
I held my breath as I tiptoed out of the room. When the door was finally closed behind me, then and only then did I exhale.
Once in my own bed, I picked up my phone to check the time. 12:56 am. There was a text.
Christy: How’s it going? All settled in?
She’d sent it over an hour ago. Christy knew I wasn’t a night owl, and we’d said our goodnight’s earlier. She must’ve been feeling insecure. I doubted she was still up, but I wanted there to be a text for her when she woke up.
Me: Hey. Rough night. Anna had a night terror.
I was about to set the phone down when her typing indicator started moving.
Christy: Poor thing. Is she okay now?
Me: Yeah. She’s snoring away.
Christy: Good. I’ll talk to you tomorrow?
Me: You bet. G’night.
Before pressing send, I quickly added…
Me: I love you.
Christy: Love you 2.
I set my alarm and laid the phone on the wicker chair next to the wall. Then I flopped back on my pillow and stared into the darkness. There were no doubts left.
God wouldn’t put me in a situation where I’d end up in bed with the woman I’d loved my entire life. No. This was the work of someone completely wily. Someone who had endless time on their hands to cook up mischief.
The only being beyond this world who would find pleasure in torturing her sibling like this was Sophie.
nine
CLEMENTINE
Istood in front of the coffee pot, trying to force my eyes to stay open. At some point in the night, Silas had managed to get back to his own bed. But I’d conked out next to Anna and hadn’t woken up until the alarm went off on my phone. My neck hurt from sleeping with only the corner of a pillow. It had taken all my energy to brush my teeth. I didn’t have the motivation to even put on mascara. Or deodorant. Or clean clothes. Was it normal to be this tired after a bad night’s sleep?
I glimpsed at my Apple Watch. “Anna,” I called. “Twenty minutes.”
My phone dinged on the counter and I groaned. Freaking Billy would not leave me alone.
