Titus continues; he tells me how Everett stalked him on the battlefield and watched him burn the fallen bodies.Knowing that Titus has buried my people only expands the unfamiliar sensation inside my chest.
“He was testing you,” I point out.
“He was,” Titus huffs in annoyance. “All these questions about why I did this and not that. I knew what he was doing.”
“Why did you reply?”
Titus drums his fingers on the polished floor; no sound echoes. These castle walls are the belly of a beast. Nothing, not screams or shouts of glee, escape.Everything is sacrificed for the crown.
“I don’t know.” Titus glances away. “I suppose having a conversation made me feel civilized again.”
What good is a kingdom if shattered minds fill it? How can I repair them, erase all the wrongs done to people like Titus?
“We forget soldiers are people. I am sorry for what you had to endure.”
His eyes shift towards me, like brown timbers bracing a mountain of truth. “I killed many of your kind.”
“You can’t accept sympathy,” I say.
“It’s not owed to someone like me.”
“Gifts are given, not owed. Titus, you’re not the villain. There is no difference between you and a fae warrior. Your fight is to survive, return home, and live.”
Why can’t I look away? I want to hug him… hold him. I want to cry and feel his arms embrace me as I do.
Thump! Thump!
Does he feel it, too?
“It does not seem your wish but your fate that set you on this path.” I confess, my tone somber and soft.
“It is.” Titus’s heavy exhale fills the space between us. “Sometimes I want to get off of it.”
Determination settles on his brow; I need to wipe it off. “The path can be challenging, endless, but stepping a toe off of it is often what kills us.”
“Now you sound like your brother.”
I smile; it’s stretched with heartache and honor. It’s a kingdom’s flag that withstood the entire war, threadbare and riddled with holes, but it survived only to realize its country did not.There’s dignity in knowing you fought till the end, rather than lowering your flag and watching the enemy burn it.
Everett fought to his end.Titus was his flag. I shall carry him.
“Everett had his reasons; you have to do as he commanded, or you will change the outcome he died for.”
Titus holds his breath. “I understand that now. I am trying hard, Selene, but I have my moments. Doubts tell me to run away from this mission. The only thing keeping one foot in front of the other is thinking like a soldier. This is just another order I must fulfill.”
His words are a gust of wind that extinguishes a flame. My hatred of him is choked out. It’s nothing more than smoke vanishing from my mind’s eye.
Titus is of a noble heart, just as Everett predicted.
Did Everett foresee this very moment, when I forgive the act I once considered unforgivable?
A hard swallow thickens my throat, crashing down to my belly. “What else did Everett say?”
“He didn’t say he was happy I killed him. I lied to Sable.”
“I know. Go on.” I look at the tapestries. Mentally, I erase their pictures; I repaint what Titus tells me.
“There was something odd, something I said, but it was as if someone else spoke it for me. Everett said, ‘Some say symbols caused this war.’ But my reply wasn’t my own; I told him, ‘Others argue symbols ended it.’”
