I didn’t want to hear about the battle.
Molly appeared at my side a few minutes later, smiled warmly at the two men speaking intently over the chessboard, and said, “Hey, Harry.”
“Molls. What’s Christmas like for the Winter Lady?”
Her eyes sparkled. She was in her human glamour this morning. She looked age-appropriate and weight-appropriate—presumably the way she would have looked if she hadn’t gotten dragged into the affairs of wizards and faerie queens. Blond hair, blue eyes, cheeks that were rounded and pink with the winter morning cold. She looked like a kindergarten teacher.
“Oh, I’ll visit vassals and bring gifts and word from Mab tonight,” she said. “Plus, I sent the troops home to visit their families. Seems like the least I could do.”
Part of the Winter Lady’s duties was stealing away the children of her vassals to serve in Winter’s forces. They’d been building ever since she’d gotten on the job.
“Seems right,” I said. “But how are you?”
She looked at me searchingly for a moment, then frowned at the children. Maggie drove her new bike in a wobbly line that ended at a small snowbank and sent her rolling to the snow amid much giggling.
“In a lot of ways, it’s like being the big sister to a whole lot of jawas,” she said. “It…surprised me, how comfortable it felt. Taking charge of that many fae.” She shook her head. “The Leanansidhe was getting me ready for this role for a reason.” The little chill in the pit of my stomach was echoed in the faint frown around her eyes. “I’m good at this work, Harry. I solve rivalries. Resolve disputes. Help fix problems. I’m everyone’s big sister. And they look up to me.”
“They give you any trouble?” I asked. The Winter Court could hardly interact with me without making at least a perfunctory effort to eat or kill me. I constantly had to remind them why that was unwise.
“Not after Unalaska,” she muttered.
“What?”
She shook her head. “It isn’t important. They found out early that I’m not to be trifled with. I haven’t had to do much more than drop Mab’s name occasionally.”
Her expression was remote but unhappy for a moment. Then she saw me looking, smiled, and it was gone. “You look like you’ve stopped losing weight.”
“Yeah,” I said. “If I can figure out how to get more sleep, I should be fine.”
“Best I can do is thirty-year stretches,” she said. “And you might have things to do before that spell came undone.”
“Yeah, I don’t need to be Van Winkled.” Little Harry helped Maggie onto the bike again and tried to talk up her confidence as he helped her get it going once more. I suspected Maggie was throwing it a little. She was an uncommonly well-coordinated child. I think she was indulging young Harry’s genuine enjoyment in teaching and supporting her.
She was a hell of a kid.
“Have you decided yet?” Molly asked quietly.
“Decided what?”
“If you want to live or not,” she said quietly, bluntly.
I nodded toward Maggie. “She needs me.”
She snorted. “Does that dodge work with everyone else? Especially now that she’s living with you?”
“Most people get a really nervous look when they get anywhere close to asking me something like that,” I said, “and they think better of it.”
She bumped my thigh with her hip. “Yeah. But I’m not afraid of you.”
I exhaled slowly.
She wasn’t.
“Harry,” she said. “Do you want to live?”
“I’m trying to remember how,” I said quietly. “I’m still in that space where…I don’t know. I don’t think much past the next meal.”
“I’m aware,” she said wryly. “Especially when you’re in close proximity, but anytime I think about you. It’s like I get this update about you, from Winter. I get flashes of what you feel like.”
