“You lost fair and square and got capturated!” I told her. “Those were the rules!”
“I am bound to serve your lord, as he defeated my lord,” Lacuna replied in a dark tone. “I must serve. I need not like it.”
Biggun footsteps came down the hall, and Sir William, who served my lord, poked his head into the kitchen. Sir William was not tall for a human, but looked very square and strong, as if he would be able to hold up the corner of the Castle if that block there failed.
“Harry?” Will called. “Oh, hey.”
My lord mopped his hands over his face and looked up. His face was red, especially his nose and eyes. “Will.”
“The Velasquezes’ little girl is out of the hospital,” Will said. “They’re bringing her back here tonight.”
A faint smile touched my lord’s face. “Oh, thank God. Fever broke?”
Sir William nodded, returning the smile. “After Michael Carpenter visited.”
Dark creases appeared in the skin at the corner of my lord’s eyes for a moment. “Well, obviously.” He raised his voice. “Bob?”
For a second, nothing happened. Then a point of blue light appeared and flickered within the stone of the Castle’s walls, as if the solid rock had become translucent. A voice emanated from the stone, piping, “Here, boss!”
Mister flew across the kitchen floor, bounded upon a counter with a grace that belied his years, and pounced upon the blue light in the wall, paws flailing.
“Ack!” Bob said. “Harry! This isn’t respectful!”
My lord gathered Mister up into his arms, and the big cat purred for a moment before flowing down to the floor again. “Bob, make sure the temperature in the Velasquezes’ quarters stays warm and regulated tonight,” he said. “Last thing I want is to get her back together with her parents and then have her take a chill and get sick again.”
“Will do!” Bob the Castle answered, and the light vanished.
Mister looked about the kitchen for a moment, evidently hoping for the light to return, then flicked his stub of a tail and ambled away in disappointment.
“And actually there’s the kitchen budget to go over,” Will said. He held up a clipboard covered with the sheets of floppy wood that the humans love so much.
“Hell’s bells,” my lord said.
“I know, I know,” Sir William said, “but there are thirty to fifty people eating here every meal, everything is spotty on deliveries, and prices are getting weird. It’s gotta get done.”
My lord checked the kitchen timer, nodded, and said, “I have a few minutes. Major General, I’ll be back before the pizza is done and we’ll take it up to the roof.”
I saluted crisply. “Yes, my lord. I will guard the kitchen.”
My lord and his castellan walked away on vital business beyond the ken of mere soldiers like me, their huge footsteps and low voices lingering long, long after they had passed.
“And now we wait to poison ourselves with pizza,” Lacuna said in her flat, adorable way.
“Nonsense!” I replied. “It is my lord who poisons us!”
Mister batted his catnip mouse across the room and romped after it gamely. Lacuna and I had to flutter out of his way or risk injury. Though we had grown quite large, Mister was yet mighty and fell.
It was only after the buzz of our wings had faded that I heard the villains breach the Castle.
There was a distant, faint, but weirdly piercing hissing sound, a crackling, like bacon on a stove over a fire, and it chewed at the insides of my ears like tiny bugs running around in there. We had only been staying all night in the Castle for two weeks (and mylord said that’s why it was called a fortnight!) but I had heard the enchanted stones of the Castle react in anger to invaders before.
Lacuna’s head snapped around at the same time as mine—as did Mister’s. The big tomcat let out a low, mewling growl, and his gray fur rose.
“We are under attack!” I cried. “The pizza must be guarded!”
Lacuna’s blade whispered as it slithered free of its sheath. “Of course, the pizza must be guarded,” she snapped affectionately. “I am without armor. You must be the vanguard. I will remain here.”
“Aye, my love! Castle Bob!” I thundered.
