I end up going back to the station with her and figuring out all the details. They’ll fit me with a wire, and some plainclothes officers will be on standby in case I get into trouble. I’m not scared. I’ve only been alive for real for a few days—the life span of a fruit fly. The stakes aren’t that high compared to someone with a real life. What have I got to lose? What has anyone got to lose if I die?
Denise has me text Kobra.
Meet at your place? Tomorrow?
10 pm. I’ll pic u up.
Gross.
When I step out of the police department I know I’ve done the right thing.
I might not know who I was or what I wanted before, but I know who I am now. I was born last Tuesday, which makes me a Gemini. I can’t remember the whole Gemini myth—something about Castor and Pollux and one of them dying. At any rate, Old Mia is dead and New Mia is #indahouse, cleaning up all the shit that Old Mia left lying around. That bitch was messy.
As for my love life…a part of me still thinks it’s nuts to give up on a relationship with the most forgiving billionaire in the world, but New Mia wants to be with Max. I knowthat with absolute certainty. He’s a little stupid, as Fay proved, and he might be bad at sex. But he’s also the kind of guy who helps a deranged stranger solve the mystery of her identity without (too much) fuss, he knows where the best tacos are, and…I feel like myself when I’m with him. Myactualself. Whoever she is.
I have a plan. I’m going to woo Max the same way I do everything: through Instagram, but with a radical new approach—at least for me.
No filter. No editing.
I take a selfie in front of the Long Beach Police Department. I look like hell and I know it. My face is shiny and my mascara is smeared. I’m still wearing my yellow dress. It is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but I use the first shot I take. I want to do another one at a slightly better angle, a picture where I’m making less of a dumb face, but I go with the first take.
To me, I look really bad, but in reality, it’s how I look in this moment on planet earth. I look like reheated, six-day-old tater-tot casserole. That’s literally what I am. It’s not like I stick out. Most people look like warmed-up leftovers. That’s why Instagram invented filters in the first place.
I type out my caption without overthinking it.
I am @Mia4Realz. I’ve been online for years, but this is the first time you’re meeting me. Before, I was a fake. The new me is 100 percent honest, no filters, no Snapchat, no lies. Why the change? I woke up to find that I’m wanted by the police for check fraud, my bank accounts are empty, and someone triedto kill me. I’m a mess, but I’m going to get it back together. I will post pictures on my journey to figure out who I am and what happened to me. Follow along!
I immediately get a bunch of likes and lots of comments. Most of the comments are sad emojis. But I see a few comments on photos from the weekend, too.OMG, @BlackEinstein314 is sooooooo cute. Heart eyes heart eyes!
Good luck!
Following along.
I text Max with a link to my profile with an updated bio:
Criminal charges and debt: in progress
Love life: in progress
The rest: Our father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.61
Three dots appear and then they disappear. It’s not a rejection. It’s not approval, but I’ll take it. He’s thinking.
58It seems like every part of their relationship was “fine” and Max didn’t notice.
59For the sake of argument, let’s pretend I know my true self.
60Sorry, therapists everywhere!
61Definitely Catholic.
CHAPTER
TWENTY-FOUR
As luck would have it, Denise is leaving the station at the same time as me and gives me a lift to GoldRush with a gruff “As long as I’m dropping you off at work.” She seems thrilled (relatively speaking) to support me in: 1) moving on from the boyfriend she didn’t trust, and 2) earning money at legitimate employment. When she sees where she’s dropping me off, she sighs, looking a little disappointed and very unsurprised. “Jesus, Wallace. Try to keep your clothes on.”
I point at the Prada gown that I’ve never been out of and say, “They’d have to pay me a lot to take this off, obviously,” and she actually cracks a smile.
