“What the fudge...” Piper mutters, and I bite back another laugh.
“Anyway, that was back in Mississippi when I was packing up Troy and Julie’s house.” The words still feel like shards of glass in my throat.
“Tell me you had better luck with movers than you did with nannies.”
“Yeah, but I did most of the work myself.” I needed to touch their things, pack their memories, and try to understand why they thought I could do this. I don’t say that to Piper, of course. No need to completely expose my soft underbelly. “Like I said, no one knows about Ellie. I don’t want the press getting wind of it or having my personal life drama take away from the focus on football leading up to the season.”
I see Piper’s walls go up as she straightens her shoulders. “Oh yeah.” Her voice drips with sarcasm. “Heaven forbid an orphaned child take attention away from the precious football season.”
“It’s not like that.” I drain half the mug of coffee in one go, then refill it before turning back to face her. “I’m looking at options, but I want them vetted. My attorney has strict instructions not to reveal my identity if he finds a family member who might be a good fit. Not at first, anyway. I don’t want them to take Ellie just because…”
“They could bleed you dry?” Disappointment flickers across her face.
“For all I care, Ellie can have everything I own,” I say, and it’s the damn truth. Every penny, every trophy, every stupid endorsement deal. Anything that would get rid of the guilt that’s been eating me alive since…
I shake my head to block that train of thought. “I don’t want someone taking her for reasons other than love. She deserves everything her parents would have given her along with a person who knows what the hell they’re doing.”
The kitchen goes quiet except for Ellie’s happy babbling.
Piper’s eyes shimmer like she’s fighting back tears.
“Please don’t cry,” I say, panic rising in my chest. “If there’s anything worse than a baby crying, it’s a woman crying. Especially if I’m the asshole who caused it.”
“I’m not crying because of you,” she snaps, brushing a hand over each cheek. “It’s just...” She blinks hard and swallows.
“I get it.” I nod, sagely. The fact is, I’m kind of an expert on women. “You’re crying because it’s your period.”
Piper blinks, then glares as if evolution hit pause when it got to me, my knuckles still scraping the sidewalk when I walk. “For fudge sake, Felix, it’s not my period.”
“It wasn’t a criticism,” I quickly amend.
“Shut up and let me talk.”
“Roger that.” I mime zipping my lips shut and earn a nod of approval.
“I never knew my dad.” Piper places a soft kiss on the top of Ellie’s head. “And I was twelve when my mom died. I mean, I had Sadie to raise me, and, as you know, she’s amazing. But I understand what it’s like to grow up without your parents. And you’re right, she deserves to be loved the way her mom and dad loved her.”
I wait for her to say something—anything—to confirm what we both know. That I’m clearly not the right person for this. But she doesn’t. Maybe there’s no need to state the obvious. Or maybe, just maybe, she sees something I don’t.
I want to believe there’s a chance that someone believes in me the way I can’t believe in myself. And right now, against all logic and history between us, I want that person to be Piper.
Neither of us speaks, but the unexpected connection between us pulses in the silence like a heartbeat.
I clear my throat to break whatever spell we’re under and take a step forward. “I can take her now.”
She frowns like she doesn’t want that, but stands and hands the baby to me.
Ellie pats my cheek with her sticky fingers, and I pat hers right back. When she’s not crying, the kid is cute as hell. She’s cute as hell when she’s crying, too, but I definitely prefer her like this.
“How long are you staying here?” Piper asks, wiping blueberry residue from the counter with a napkin.
I shrug. “A few weeks. Maybe longer. I don’t have to be at training camp until late July, and the house I bought won’t be ready until right around then. I’m having a bunch of renovations done.”
“In Denver?” Her tone is neutral, but I catch something underneath it. It could be hopefulness or it might track closer to disappointment. Piper is a bit of a mystery to me, and I’m surprised how much I want to figure her out.
“Yeah, Denver,” I confirm. “My trainer’s coming up tomorrow. Tyler will whip me into shape before team workouts start.” I gesture toward the stairs leading to the lower level. “Ian’s got an insane setup in the basement. It puts most pro gyms to shame.”
Piper’s eyebrows draw together. “And who will be watching Ellie while you’re working out?”
