I step forward and into his arms, hugging him tightly around the middle. “Thank you, Cass. Truly. And I’ll make a statement to the Council of Nine themselves if that’s what it takes. I’ll do it in front of the whole of Packs Radcliffe and Rose. I’m done letting fear dictate my actions. I’m done feeling trapped by it. If you need my testimony, you’ll have it.” I nod toward the doors. “Don’t leave him waiting. I believe he actually wants to help.”
CHAPTER39
Ellie excuses herself when I dip back into the nest, giving my shoulder a squeeze as we pass.
I stretch and go to sit in the chair beside the nest, but Simon reaches for me and I’m more than happy to crawl in beside him.
“Missed you,” I tell him.
“Missed you too, kit-kat.”
“I was going to meet you at Ciel until he threatened me,” I whisper. “I thought if I put some distance between us, he wouldn’t target you.”
“I knew the risks, and I could have walked away because of them. I wasn’t in the dark, Junes. Ididpull away from you, but you know how I said I’m good at fixing everyone’s problems but my own?” He takes my hands in his, taking care not to touch my bandaged wrists. “Well, Cassian complicates things. He’d say something to you, and I’d get mad. We’d fight.”
“Over me.”
“Pft, no. Over his bullshit behavior. He’s been an asshole to you since you got to Fairhaven. I don’t tolerate his puffed-up alpha bullshit at the best of times, but when it had to do with you? Saints, Junes, you’d come to mecryingover him. The hurtful shit he said to you… the only reason I didn’t hex his balls off over it is because Iknewhe meant well, in his own stupid, twisted way. He’d say something derogatory to you so you’d work harder, so you’d be even more prepared. And you always did, you know? After he insulted your shields, you came to me, and we practiced. Look, I’m not saying it’s not total bullshit. It is. And I give you permission to hex my alpha’s dick tiny since I’m clearly not up to using it right now. But Cassian… he’s got more alpha instincts than sense sometimes. More good looks, too. Saints, I swear, when it comes to feelings, that alpha’s the biggest idiot there is.”
I poke Simon in the belly, low, below the bandages that wrap around his torso. “Are you telling me you fell for Cassian because of his dashing good looks?”
He quirks a rust-red brow. “Are you telling me you didn’t?”
I laugh. “As much of a jerk as he can be, I’m glad you two have each other.”
Simon turns serious, rolling to tangle with me, wincing but ignoring his pain. “I want you too, kit-kat. I can’t change that I’m mated to Cassian.”
“I don’t want you to. I just wish… I wish you’d told me the truth. I wish I hadn’t found out you were mated how I did. I… people close to me lying to me is something I really struggle with.”
“Oh, Juniper,” he says, touching his forehead to mine. “You’re right, fuck. I didn’t even think of it that way.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I told him not to,” Cassian says, from the door to the nest.
“Don’t hex him,” Simon says in a low voice. “He’s a controlling, feelings-impaired idiot, but please don’t hex him. Not right now, at least.”
I roll my eyes but nod toward Simon’s other side and Cassian approaches cautiously.
“Get in, idiot,” I tell him. “We’re talking about our feelings.”
Cassian sighs and sits at the edge of the nest, the mattress dipping under his weight. “I’m bad at this, Junes. I treated you like shit because I thought you despised me, because I was some jilted alpha who wasn’t even jilted at all. And I will never forgive myself for that. I don’t expect you too, either. When you started falling for Simon, I was… jealous. Because you loved my mate, but not me.”
“She hasn’t even said it once yet,” Simon mutters. “Let alone the one thousand times I require of her. Stop saying it for her. Make her use her big girl words.”
“Oh shush,” I chide. “You know I love you.”
“Say it again?”
I smile. “I love you, I love you, I love you. There, only 996 more to go.”
“Love you too, Junes,” he says, nuzzling into me.
“Simon’s the one you chose over me.”
“I didn’t choose himoveryou. As far as I knew, I’d never have your love. You weren’t someone Icouldchoose. And when you weren’t, when I was at my lowest, there was this sweet, goofy, incredibly handsome beta who helped tutor my dumb ass because I was struggling in all my classes and was too proud to admit it. Saints, Simon saw straight through me from the first time we met.”
“Whatever happens,” Simon says quietly, “you two can’t try to compete for me. I want you both. Cassian is the one who mated me, and I love him, but that doesn’t change how I feel about you, Juniper. That I want you.”
