A deal went sideways, and it was during the fight that followed that my future and Declan’s were sealed. My mate had always had a short, explosive temper and when Declan saw red, you needed to get the fuck out of his way. The group of fellas that jumped us in an alleyway clearly hadn’t gotten that memo.
We’d chased them off, but one of them wasn’t quite quick enough on his feet to escape Declan’s fury. Dec nearly killed him, beating him to a pulp until his face was barely recognisable. We had thought to return to the camp victorious but the reality of how deep into the shite we were was soon explained to us. That wee fella hadn’t been just any lowlife – he’d been the right hand for the nasty bastard that headed up that Romanian gang. News of his best mate getting pummelled had reached him quickly and now Declan and I were on his radar. He was coming for us, and it didn’t bear thinking about what would happen if he caught up.
There was nothing else for it. Declan and I needed to get out of Dublin. We decided between ourselves that we wouldn’t tell anyone where we were going andin the middle of the night, we hooked Declan’s caravan to my van and headed off to pastures new.
We toured around Ireland for some time, never hitching up for more than a couple of days before moving on. That was one of the biggest perks of living the way we did, we left no paper trail, no evidence. It would be impossible for those fellas to track us down now and it was only once we were out on the road that I realised just how heavily that life had weighed upon me.
Both Declan and I left the past behind us and started to put plans in place for a better future. I swapped the van for a flatbed, and we emblazoned the logo of our new landscaping business all over it. Working with my da had set us up well and we quickly found our feet, using the infamous tricks of the trade to ensure we were never short of a few quid ever again.
For the first time in a long time, I felt at peace. Leaving Dublin had been a fresh start, a second chance and it was one I had sorely needed. That was until we settled down in a wee hitching site and I crossed paths with Eoghan.
It was only a small place, no more than a handful of caravans parked up. When Declan and I had picked up a lengthier landscaping gig – felling a tree and a full garden remodel – we’d decided to settle there until the job was done. We’d quickly gotten to know our new neighbours, one of them being of instant interest to me.
Eoghan was an attractive fella, tall, well-built, and at least a decade older than me and Declan, though I couldn’t be sure. I’d been drawn to him almost immediately, but that was nothing new. I had grown used to noticing handsome fellas, but I wasn’t so used to them noticingmein return.
It had been electric. From the moment we locked eyes, Eoghan was all I could think about and when I continually caught him eyeing me with that same heated expression, it set me alight.
Despite being older, twenty-one by this time, I was thrown back in time, feeling like a nervous teenager all over again. This was new to me. I didn’t know how to handle these feelings. The closest I’d come to anything like this had been flicking through the pages of that jazz mag. This was different. I finally had a real chance at bringing those fantasies to life and it scared the shite out of me.
As per usual, Declan had quickly locked onto the only attractive, single girl in the camp and was fully distracted. I’d never been so relieved to be dumped for a wee geebag in my life.
With Declan’s attention elsewhere, I was free to flirt with the idea of exploring the side of me I tried so hard to deny. Eoghan’s clear reciprocation of interest bolstered my confidence and gave me a boost that I hadn’t felt in a long time. There was no worry or guesswork involved. He was interested in me in the same way I was interested in him, and it was just a matter of time. One of us had to make the first move and as excited as I was, it wasn’t going to be me.
One chilly winter’s night, I found myself outside of my caravan. The proverbial sock was on the door handle and as such, I passed another miserable evening freezing my bollocks off whilst Declan got the ride in.
I leant back into a wee rickety picnic chair, taking a drag from my cigarette and blowing the smoke up into the star-studded sky. It was baltic, but I enjoyed the peace.
“Y’got another o’ them, fella?”
My body was shot with tension immediately and my head snapped up. Eoghan strolled over to me, lopsided smirk in place.
“A-aye,” I spluttered, digging around in the pockets of my denim jacket for my cigs. I pulled them free and held them out, praying my hand wasn’t shaking. Eoghan took his time selecting a cigarette before slipping one out of the packet and placing it between his lips.
“A wee light, now?”
I lifted my hips up to slide my hand into my jeans pocket, stomach flipping over when I saw Eoghan’s gaze flicker down to my crotch. He didn’t care that I’d caught him looking, holding my eye contact brazenly. I barely held back a smile of my own, throwing my lighter over to him. He caught it, lit up, and then chucked it back.
“Bit chilly t’ be out stargazing, no?” he asked me, sucking on his cigarette.
“Aye,” I laughed. “But Declan’s gettin’ his end away. I’d be keepin’ outta his way, like.”
Eoghan’s eyes drifted to the caravan before turning back to me. He sniffed and shuffled foot to foot.
“Ya up f’a bit o’ fun yourself, now?”
I froze, heart beating out of my chest. Despite my nerves, I forced myself to play it cool. I took a long drag of my cigarette before answering.
“Ya offerin’?”
Eoghan grinned at me. “Might be, aye. Thought I’d best be checkin’ I’m not barkin’ up the wrong tree first, like.”
I hesitated. It was now or never.
“Nah, no wrong tree here, fella.”
“Grand.” Eoghan dropped his cigarette to the floor, stubbing it out with his foot. “Seein’ as ya gaff is occupied, y’wanna come wi’ me?”
I blew out one last cloud of smoke before stubbing my own cigarette and heaving myself to my feet. Eoghan took my silent compliance as a ‘yes’ and I followed behind him as we made our way to his caravan on the far side of the camp.
