Will the boys have me back?
That’s a damn good question.
All I can do is hope like fuck they don’t kick me to the curb.
***
All this flying in such a short amount of time is hard on the body. My muscles ache, and I’m sure there are warnings about health risks, but I need to be home.
My real home.Los Angeles, USA.
It’s been a long time coming, and it has been even longer since I’ve been back here. Living in the UK for the last year has been a challenge and a massive change in my lifestyle. Being away frommy bandmates and family has been brutal. A more than obvious step in thewrongdirection. I know that now, but hindsight is the mother of all bitches when she wants to be.
Forming Recoil was something that came as a natural progression back when I was young.
At school, I met twin brothers, Matt and Nate. Matt’s ability to coax out the bassline in a song and develop the deep tenor in the harmonies was something I’d never heard. While Nate's mastery of percussion dynamics is unmatched. Ryan joined the band as lead guitarist not long after we left school. The licks he can run are extraordinary and out of the realm of my abilities. It was this realization that solidified my role as lead singer and rhythm guitarist in the band.
Our foursome was tight.
Our music was solid.
Our thunderous rock power riffs were electrifying.
Everything was going great.
We’d found our niche.
But everything changed when touring and playing alongside the grunge rock band12GAUGE-Slayed.
That’s when I met…her.
Ella Slade.
A knot forms in my chest as the cab pulls up in front of my old home. I lived here with Ryan, my best friend and lead guitarist, through many tough times.
I’ve missed him.
The crazy guy who was always there to cheer me up, no matter how somber my mood got. Ryan’s a character who never fails to entertain.
Even though he is older than me, him at the ripe old age of thirty-two, and me at twenty-six, we immediately hit it off when we met. Nothing could get between us—even a six-year age gap.
Nothing except for Ella.
Don’t get me wrong, he loved Ella, and they got along great. I think he didn’t realize how crazy I was about her until I left the USA to be with her. Then shit hit the fan, and our friendship faltered. I know he feels like I chose Ella over him and the band.
Let’s face it, I did.
I wish I hadn’t, but I’m here now to make it right.
The house looks exactly the same—stucco front with white trimmings. I didn’t realize how homesick I was until I’m sitting here staring at it right now.
Taking a deep breath, I hop out of the cab, grab my luggage, and pay the driver. He speeds off, leaving me looking up at the driveway with an ache in my stomach.
Ryan doesn’t know I’m coming.
I thought surprise could be the best angle.
Let’s hope I’m right.
