God, I miss her.
***
I’ve been catching up with Charlie casually over the last week, and right now we’re in the kitchen making coffee, and my mind is a mess. I wish I knew where my head was taking me. I’m zoned out as I pour the pot. The boiling liquid splashes out over the mug and onto the countertop.
“Shit!” I call out and quickly grab the dishcloth, moving in to wipe up the hot mess.
Charlie slides in, grabs the mug, and carries it to the sink, emptying it while I wipe down the counter and let out a heavy sigh.
“Thanks,” I murmur.
She chuckles, moving in behind me to catch the liquid now spilling over the edge that I didn’t see, and collects it with another cloth, wiping it in time with me as we stand next to each other. With our sides touching, she smiles as I turn to lean against the counter.
“We make a good team, you and me,” she says.
That’s when I notice something shift in her. Her eyes sparkle, and she draws her bottom lip in with her teeth.
Something is happening.
I’m just not sure what.
“We do,” I say.
Charlie steps closer, suddenly in my space, and her hands move from the counter to my chest while her eyes stay focused on mine. My hands move to the side like I have no idea where to put them, as I’m kind of lost. I think I know what’s happening, but like a deer caught in the headlights, I’m stunned at the moment.
“I was hoping you would say that,” she murmurs and pushes up on her toes.
My body tenses, andnotin a good way.
I should want this.
Charlie’s practically my perfect ten, but right now, all I can see flashing through my mind are images of Alex, and my chest heaves as her lips inch closer to mine. Charlie’s so close her breath tickles my skin. I wince away as her lips go to touch mine.
I can’t do it.
I pull back, grabbing her shoulders to stabilize and hold her away from me. At the same time, her eyes fling open, and she looks at me like she’s in shock.
“I’m sorry, Charlie,” I blurt out.
She swallows hard, her face dropping like she’s going through a million thoughts in her mind all at once. Her eyes flicker from side to side like you’d see in someone who’s having a mental breakdown.
It unsettles me. “Charlie?”
She steps back, breaking free from my grip forcefully, and glares at me so fiercely it shocks the hell out of me. Her stare is cold, hard, and calculating. “I didn’t want to have to do this, Matt,” she says.
“Sorry… what?”
She flares her nostrils and opens her handbag, pulling out a ream of paper. It’s quite thick, maybe thirty pages, and I furrow my brows, looking at the typed notes. On the front page is aprofile—on me.Tensing up, I take a step back as my breaths come in hard and fast, trying to figure out what the hell is happening right now. I grab the profile and turn to page two, and it’s dot points—on me. Details of everything I’ve told her. She’s written everything down.
I slam my fist onto the pages and glare at her. “What the fuck is this?” I yell. She doesn’t even budge like she knew it was coming.
“It’s not just on you, it’s about all your band mates, too. Everything you’ve said, everything I’ve dug up. Every little detail I could find or get out of you.”
“Charlie!”
“C’mon, Matt, you know I work for an LA paper. You can’t honestly think I’m going to let a story like meeting a Recoil band member go by, do you? I couldn’t believe my luck when you turned up. It was like all my dreams had come true at once,” she declares.
I throw my hands in the air. “So what? You think I’m just going to let you print all that stuff about me? About Madeline…fuck, about Alex?”
